Love a Lot

2011-07-15T10:10:00.000+08:00

Goodwill Turned Out To Be Misunderstanding

Sometimes I don't get it why I am such a kind person (I don't meant to joke here)...

Anyways, I guess that's me, no matter how many friends of mind claimed that I've changed, even my face is different now... You gotta ask me why personally.

I feel... I'm still me, the same old me.

But something new, I learn to suspect and have negative thoughts in EVERYONE, including... YOU! I've learnt that no matter how good you are or how much trust you have on a person, in the end you'll just experience the ugly truth. So why make people's life easy?

From the beginning, just there's no need to trust! Suspect whenever I like... What?? I'm crazy, no I ain't crazy... Can't take it? Yeah you can leave, go straight turn left, the exit is there.

Apart from that, I never say no to people who need my help but provided its beyond my capability to help...

So whatever it is... the past is gone BUT what you've done to me, still stay in my heart, the pain will never go away... That's for sure...

2011-05-04T12:19:00.000+08:00

It's Really Unexpected

I know I shouldn't even blog about this, I should have no feelings over this news at all but, here I'm as soft hearted as ever.

Kevin's shop has closed down.

Many said it is "bou yeng" (karma) but... I never feel such way... I know that there might be something wrong in between that nobody would even know.

Or maybe, you guys are right, this is the price for him to pay for what he have done in the past. Not forgetting what I've warned him earlier before he stepped on this.

He saw this as an opportunity, I saw this as a very confident-less option.

But I was his "partner" at that time, support was all I had to give.

However, I wish... I really wish from the bottom of my heart, you'll not give up and hope you learn your mistake in handling business... And wish for better days for you and her... and your family.

2011-04-12T14:23:00.000+08:00

I've Been Sick So Often Lately

I'm sick... again...

I was talking to a good friend of mine yesterday and I remembered clearly I mentioned to him that the incident is now being read as 5 months ago.

Time flies...

Thinking of what I've been doing this 5 months, nothing but crazy stuff. I don't recall my self sleeping before 2am. I only remember I slept 2 - 3hrs the past few nights. I club, drink, drunk, smoke and starve myself simply becos of my bad lifestyle, I lost appetite tremendously.

It's scary when I think back, but I can't help it... I'm still like this now...

But I wish to change and go back to a healthier lifestyle. I feel really suffocating, I don't like to be sleepy every single day at work. It's driving me nuts!

And I don't wanna fall sick so often...

I wish to stay at home more, I love spending time in my room, it's comfortable and safe.

I hope... This is my right path, I'm already on it, walking forward...

I hope for a change in my lifestyle, happier and healthier...

God Bless

2011-04-06T14:04:00.000+08:00

Nothing to explain, Nobody to justify, No time to prove...

I think the title is the best quote I've ever made, seriously...

I always say that it's so difficult to describe my feeling deep under but now I've found the right words, put them together just like this and voila... That's how simple it is!??!!

I know, I know... I know I can't turn back time. I know what I've missed, I've missed eventually. I'm adapting survival skills from my past "experience". I don't even bother to blame myself cos it's completely not my fault to become this crazy, I can be laughing at this moment, the next minute I'm already crying, what are all these? I don't really know... Seriously I don't really know...

I don't even know how long I can stand this kind of imbalances... SO SUFFOCATING!!!!

I'm dealing with imaginations of their past, dealing with blames and narrow eyes from people around me, dealing with curses, dealing with closest people saying I must have lost my brain to make such decision, one even decided to "unfriend" me because of this decision.

I dunno how to deal with my own emotions already, I'm officially going crazy... INSANITY KILS!!!

2011-04-04T11:27:00.001+08:00

Hectic Weekend with the Gang

See, the weekend was all good except the fact that I had my... period... which almost killed my life! Fine... guys, you may stop reading if you don't wanna know how disgusting it can be...

I had the most angry Friday ever, I almost killed Raymond (just joking), he got scolded for nothing. I don't need to tell you the reason for that kind of temper =/ yeah?

So I pulled the longest face, I cried and all... I thought I've just lost my brain that night, I didn't know why I became like that also, I really need to thank god that he fully understand and he's the super calm person I've ever met, nothing surprised him, at all...

On Saturday, he made it to my house to meet the fun and crazy folks except my parents. First stage wasn't too good or bad cos I think his face is not so inviting... SIL tried to talk to him asking his occupation and stuff, but hmm I thought it was a great start. At night we went Steamboat at Sunway before clubbing nightout again. They (Raymond's friends) usually hit the club alternate week, so last week it is.

We went Opera, it's my first time there, sound system was good, worth a dance or shake. But the people there... Hmm... seafood and some of the peeps from the uncle pub I guess.

It was very pack which I hate most and not to mention the heat down there! Ahhh fml...

After a couple of drinks, and glass breaking which cut my finger... We were all tipsy and that's where the fun begins.

Later Ah B came to join us and I need to tell you that he's one freaking awesome guy. I've never seen people ever dance like that... Seriously... Please see below...

From left: Ah B and Charng Jenn, doing the gay hot n sexy dance

From left: Tom, Ah B, Charng Jenn, and Raymond acting cute

The gay duo going down down down down down... HOT!!! And my bf looking so puzzled

Very luen sui

Silly faces

One more time...

For some reason, that night ended not well. But... I enjoyed... And wanna thank everyone for that night! Lovely! I sure wanna join you guys more...

Sunday, I woke up and went for our usual Pan Mee brunch (we had Pan Mee almost every weekend), the weather was soooooo hot, damn hot! And rest at home until evening...What's best on a Sunday evening if it's not a cuppa coffee @ Desa Parkcity??? So we drove there (its a 5mins driving distance from his place) and sat down, continue chatting till the sun goes down.

His friends caught some fresh prawns and invited us for dinner, so we had a fulfilling dinner together, it was really warm and fun to have a group of friends like that.

Thanks darling for bringing me so much warmth and friends to my life.

Last night meant a lot to me... At times like that, I can't help but to think you are the best person darling... I never regret sacrifying so much for this relationship. I had to let go the eyes people have on me as a loser to be with you when we both are being disowned by them.

I love every moment with you, I love how you handle problems when I'm dead panic, I love how much you think for our future and I definately love everything about you...

Darling, thanks for accomodating all my stupid acts, I know you sure love me as who I am now =p

2011-03-31T13:56:00.000+08:00

Lily Is Gone From EH

Sigh...

I dunno what to say, I dunno how to express my feeling too...

I had the worst feeling last night... She is right, she told her successor that we are not colleagues, we are so much more than colleagues, we are not even bestfriends, we are more than that.

She involved a lot in my life this 1.5 years!

Like what?

My previous relationship, from good to bad, from bad to WORST, she has been with me all the time.

Our clubbing days, we do cheat our bfs back then that we were sleeping but instead, we were outside drinking and dancing like nobody business. Having said that, we've never betray our partner, NEVER. No hugging, no kissing... not even exchanging phone numbers. We are just not that type... We love to hang out with each other ONLY and that's all that matters.

Not only that, she's also the middle person in between me and my family. My mum will find out more about me thru her.

She's not only my partner in crime, we gossip, we talk behind people's back, we criticize people, we eat like fat pigs, we drink then drunk, we laugh and cry together, we've been thru SO MUCH in such a short period of time.

And what can be better when she can get along really well with my bf now? =) although they argue quite often.... =/

Now, I'm scared... She's no longer working with me... If you didn't know, she

decided to work part time in this company when she first resigned simply becos, she wants to spend time with me... But then, it's her future that she needs to consider now, her bf needs her to be with him for the business that they've both grew out of their hands. I'm glad, she found her happiness in this guy and I am wishing her all the best with her bf, I wanna see them tie the knot REAL soon...

The complicated feelings in me is really growing and owning up my entire brain. Last night... We spent our last after work dinner together, we've tried so hard to not dive into the fact that it was our last chance doing it. We went for Japanese cuisine, ordered and ate like pigs again (that's what we love doing)

Not only that I don't get to intercom her during working hours, I don't even get to go mad with her after 6pm in the office (we'll do crazy things after everyone left), I won't get to complain to her about camel torturing me.

I'm so sick and tired thinking how my life will be without her as my colleague. She has changed me to complete new person, I've learnt to appreciate people around me, I've learnt to be a smarter friend, I've learnt to say no to useless friends, I've learnt my manners and people skill, and... all the good things.

Lily, we promised each other yesterday, no matter what, our friendship will at least remain as it is now!

Take care my dear friend... Take care... I'll see you real soon...

I met her bestfriend Vernice... Who is now my friend as well... A really good friend, we have been having our monthly Sunway Pyramid dinner for quite sometime now

And we took another step of our close-ness, we planned a secret trip for two...

And I organized a surprise birthday party for her 2011...

And there we are, travel again together... In style =D

2011-03-21T11:04:00.000+08:00

I like to spend my weekend just the way like him

Friday night I rushed home after work and he's already patiently waiting at my door front.

Got myself changed and off we go to Sen Tsuru to meet up with his friend cos we were going to Sri Petaling for steamboat at... 11pm++ Poor guy need to work until 1030pm, clean up before he does dinner every night.

We arrived at 1130pm and started whacking the buffet style steamboat like no tomorrow.

I'm glad that I'm always part of him when he goes out, regardless with his biz partner, or school friends... In this case, his family =)

So, we completed the late dinner at 1am and we had to go home cos Raymond had to wake up early for an appointment.

The lazy me slept until 1pm++ woke up by a call from Lily, sweet... The weekend starts with Pan Heong, my favourite Wat Tan Hor in town (fried koay teow in egg gravy) with Eileen, she came all the way to fetch me there for a late lunch at 3pm.

Since I'm meeting his folks that night, I went for a hair wash and mani n pedi... Yes I know it's abit "lebih" but you can't avoid the first impression thing ok?

Lily came over at 6pm to help me to dress up and brief on how to be a good girl, I'm this bad when it comes to meeting up with new people. She knew I'm going to make a big cool face, she quickly practised with me the smile that I need to do all night. I hope I did not disappoint Raymond =)

His family was a bunch of friendly and down to earth people, and his elder brother was very humurous as well. All trying to keep me talking and feel like part of the family, I'm just so glad.

After dinner with the 15 pax, Raymond and I went to club at my 2nd home Movida, with our friends (yes... our friends =p)

He's not drunk but he's born with THIS face... =/

It was pretty good at the beginning but not until something went wrong, we left at almost 2am to join his brother's birthday celebration at Quattro KL, rushed there and his bro's gf May, was really nice to talk to me and make sure I'm good with the drunkards.

It was a messy night on Saturday, all good cos I've got my "ding ching sun mat"... The ring came very unexpectedly... Right after our dinner, I was trying to adjust my top for some embarass reason... Suddenly he grabbed my hand and slot in the ring and I was like... @@" huh?? He always laugh at my blur face and he constantly surprise pleasant and unpleasantly.

After a tiring Sat, we woke up late on Sat, he's willing to bring me and my friend out cos she's a little unhappy over something for lunch, he never mind going out with my friends and he will try to jive in with conversations. After lunch at Kota Damansara, we send our friend home and he suggested to go shopping but I didn't feel like doing shopping. So this sweetheart of mine brought me to desa parkcity, it was a drizzling Sunday noon.

We settled down in Coffee Bean, it was awesome cos that's how I like my Sunday to be, sit there for hours, chatting, watching people with their doggies, it was PERFECT. And he had to praise himself for knowing me so well and know what to do with me whenever I have no ideas. You just cannot believe how much he understands me, I almost don't need to speak when I'm with him.

We were there at 5pm till 930pm!!! Can you imagine??? So many people showing off their doggies at the park, it was breezy and everything was good.

When we looked at the clock, almost couldn't believe how long we've sat and talked. Since it was so cool last night, he suggested Loh Mee with liquor, I love that to the max, I wasn't very keen for anything too solid or heavy, his suggestion was plain perfect.

Okay I praise too much of him but... Again, I just wanna appreciate him as much as I could... Although, I cannot be sure if one day he might end up hurting me. So long I do my best, that's all that matters I guess =)

2011-03-16T11:05:00.000+08:00

When you decided to push to limit

Seriously, what's wrong with you? Both of you betrayed me, and on last freaking Christmas you BITCH admitted that, so why are you regretting now? Are you stealing Kev for the sake of the fun?

I cannot believe what you wrote to Raymond, you feel very hurt that we are together now? We are not up for revenge cos both of you don't worth having such attention from us. You begging him that you wanna go back to him? When I was Kev, you wanted him, now you have him and you wanna steal Raymond... What's wrong with you bitch? Don't test my limit seriously...

You have Kev, you have GT Proshop, you have Gucci and all... I have nothing but a pain that you two put me thru. Don't come and mess up my life AGAIN, appreciate Kev and please... Leave us alone, It's not easy for us to come this far, we are now happily each other is all because of you! We spent 3 months crying over the same sentence.... WHY DID YOU CHEAT ON ME???? Is this not enough? Seriously..?

I got over the pain that you crafted on me, I moved on, you please move on also!

Enjoy luxury money (which you like most cos you can sleep around with uncles for branded designer bagsss)... Kev has got the money to do all these for you now!

Please, enough is enough... I threw away your so called birthday present for me that you passed to Raymond on Monday, there's no need to do all these... You will have the guilt for the rest of your life, I have care and love from Raymond, his friends and family now, I'm all good...

2011-03-10T15:59:00.000+08:00

It happened just out of our expectation

It all started on 2nd March 2011, we both were certain of each other's feeling but we've been denying and lying to ourselves for quite some time already. I of course know that how others might feel... Exchange partner? Revenge? Too lonely and got hooked up on each other? Or just spent too much time going thru bad times together? Yes, I've thought of all these and I have to admit.

I understand clearly of the situation and that's the reason why I've been denying and avoiding going deeper from the friendship we've built out of the betrayal from both of our partner.

Finally, on a midnight, I was drunk with my friend and trying to get home driving like a mad F1 driver. He waited near my place and insisted to talk to me. Cut the story short... He asked for my hand and... We're on.

Before you say "Penny, do you know what the hell you are doing???"... I wanna explain that... Yes, I know. And in fact, I don't feel all good to end up with him.

He is not like Kevin, nothing like him at all. I'm not treating him as his replacement and I of course can only hope he's not making me as her replacement.

He is able to give me all the trust that I need after this case. He is not the sweet talk type, he don't tell me 100 things he can do for me...

I can't be sure he's the one, but I have more faith in him... I hope... I can only hope everything will turn out good with the minimal blessings from my friends.

2011-03-01T16:42:00.000+08:00

Which Road Will Walk Me To The Wedding Bells

It's pain to look back at the photos... I was browsing my old phone yesterday and the photos of our sweet memories really hurt me so bad, still...

I look at them, your face reminds me of the years we've been thru, good times and bad times, and yet, we held tight, until you finally found someone you love more.

Eventually, this has ruined my thinking. I don't dare to fall in love anymore, the love for you is still here, telling I have no courage to move forward.

So many people came to me, telling me things that you've said 3 years ago. Immediately, they reminds me of how I was being cheated by you.

But I'm glad, he is here... He may not be the best of all, but he is good enough for me to trust and rely on when I'm this weak. He knows that I can't fall in love anymore, but giving me a hug and borrowing a shoulder to cry on telling me "I'm here... nothing's gonna hurt you anymore, you can depend on me"... It may seems nothing, but that's what I makes me feel better. He said he knows exactly what he wants, but he won't say it out now cos he don't want unecessary pressure to be applied on me. Without official status, he is willing to play my partner's part, with no commitment from me.

I feel sorry... I really do... I don't have the courage to accept you, I don't want to be looked that way. I'm sorry you rush up and down fetching me around to meet my friends, sitting there trying to make friends with my friends. Every single thing you do, I know you don't want me to feel lonely, you get yourself ready at night, talking till I fall asleep.

The three simple words are just very difficult for me to say anymore. I can only avoid anyone who tells me these 3 words.

I'm selfish... I really am...

2011-02-28T11:23:00.000+08:00

Is getting happie... AND complicated

3 months passed, things are getting better, slowly...

We go thru the bad times together where we both fall over the same situation.
We cried, we talked bad about "them" and we comfort each other with long late night calls, whole day yum cha with teary eyes, drunk nights and screaming for an answer why are we being treated this way... So many things had happened, so many things we've gone thru and we've come this far.

He is stronger, while I'm slowly picking up too.

He's constantly by my side since Christmas Day (the worst Christmas ever cos I someone admitted she betrayed me)... He is just as sad or even more but he never fail to comfort and be there for me whenever I need him.

There's just so much to talk about us but I think I really need to be clear on where are we heading to. Of course I do see positive signs to go "further" from our friendship which started off in a very unpleasant way (to find out both our partner got together).

I dunno what should I even elaborate here but I think I'll just let things move slowly by it's own.

2011-01-17T15:34:00.000+08:00

The sun is once again, shining....

Finally, all I want to say is... Finally...

A lot of drama from the break up, I'm even considering to delete this blog and start a new one.

I've never been impacted by something so badly before, but I think I've overcome this now.

Thanks to my family and friends, I'm so not worthy, everyone just appeared everywhere around me to keep me accompanied, sleepover, endless dinner dates, birthday party, happy hour, yum cha, genting, you name it...

I am here, sincerely thanking each and everyone of you... Thanks for the sms and calls... the three words "How are you?" mean so much to me.

You guys have successfully picked me up, I'm glad it didn't take too long... 1.5 months... It's definately the toughest moment in my life...

2010-12-22T15:21:00.000+08:00

Sad, Drunk, and Stone

I went Penang again past weekend, it was a 24hrs trip.

I was really blur when I was on my way there, no, I wasn't with Lily or Jess.

And so I got there by bus, waited at Queensbay for 2 hours with my heavy bags.
My friend's brother finally came and he brought us to this... romantic place...

I wish if I still have the chance to get married, I will still choose Penang to take wedding photos.... Take a look at the pics... =)

And they also have this machine to clean the sea...

And so the night comes, I decided to go club and get myself drunk... Off we go at 1am... Drank like train...

Don't asked me what happened that night cos it's not something really nice to share... =/

Christmas is around the corner, I'll be spending my eve lunch with colleagues, boss belanja German cruisine, dinner BBQ at friends' house (this friend specially organize xmas party for me at her house), then Xmas day, I'll be spending time with my beloved family....

Hope that you'll enjoy your Festive season too...!

*hugs*

2010-12-14T10:16:00.000+08:00

I'm okay I'm okay I'm okay...

I need to start acting like I'm all okay from now on...
Until the moment I really give up "entirely"...

Sorry if it's going to hurt anyone...

I guess, nobody understands myself better, and my decision is final...

2010-12-14T05:27:00.005+08:00

If Only You Handle This Better

"This" wouldn't be an option for me now....

2010-12-10T19:10:00.000+08:00

The 3rd Weekend

I'm emotionally very unstable... This moment I'm laughing, next you see me crying.

I hate this feeling right now.

I hate that you are doing this to me.

I hate being treated this way by you.

I just hate everything now.

Everything reminds me of you... And nothing at all reminds you of me... Nothing at all... Cos... You never love me at all... 12th March 2008... I wished I never let you hold my hands, I wished I never trusted you... I wish I never know you...

2010-12-09T15:57:00.000+08:00

All about "Seperation"
As if it's not enough, Maxis made it like a divorce-ceremony.

I called to inquire about seperating the account of my number from his line.

This CS girl got it wrong and thought I wanted a seperate bill... She asked me to hold on while she called him for verification.

And the girl came back to the conversation saying that if I confirm to seperate, I agree to cancel the free calls and sms'es within my number and Mr. Kong's number. I said "Yes... by all means, get it done asap, thanks"

Then I confirmed with her "Oh wait, why did you guys ask us to go to Maxis Centre when it is actually not necessary?"

CS girl "Oh... that's to remove your number from Mr. Kong's line and transfer it under your name"

Me "Precisely what I want to do!!"

CS girl "Then you'll both need to come to our Maxis Centre to do this..."

Me "God... "

CS girl "Ms. Penny, do u confirm that you want to do this? There'll be no free calls and sms'es not even discounts calling between you and Mr. Kong from there on"

Me "I'm good about it, thanks bye"

2010-12-09T11:12:00.000+08:00

2010 Resolutions 8/15 Fulfilled

(birthday post below, scroll down)

1. to let my nails to take a breather after 3 years of OPI colours... OMG 3 years already, cannot believe it how fast the clock ticks away.

Yes, fulfilled this, my nails are now short and unpainted...

2. to really really cut that 5kg down, fml.

No, not done yet! Lost 2kg in past 2 weeks because of you.

3. to have more activities in my MID 20's... seriously... I need to party and get wild before I'm sitting there being called auntie... fml man.... MID 20's???????? Shit... Get me the bird nest now now now!!!! I wanna go travel!!!! Seriously...

Yes, party'ed, and travelled with Kevin to Melaka, and friends to Penang twice.
4. to live happily everyday.

No
5. to have changes at work in order for me to stay longer or #6

Yes
6. to find a better job, with better environment, better people, better pay, better benefits and more professional job in a bigger company, MNC please.

No, not yet
7. to take up the language course that I've been talking about since 2 years ago.
No, not yet

8. to apply lotion before I sleep, everyday.

Almost...

9. to get new cheap bag for work.
Yes, got one =)

10. to get more clothes so I don't look like I'm wearing same shirt to work every single day, but different color!!!

Yes, I got some
11. to learn to be more fashionable, with the ting ting tang tang stuff???
Yes, I got new bracelet and some necklace and rings from Lily.

12. to appreciate my friends more... my true friends... I know I've ruined some relationships due to my mood swings and all...

I hope this is a yes.

13. to blog about something more interesting maybe??? I know you find my blog damn dead bored.
No

14. to join gym.
Yes

15. to love you more =)

Yes, that's why I'm like that now... =)

2010-12-09T10:45:00.001+08:00

Love-a-Lot's Birthday 2010 (18sx)

Why do I name myself Love-a-Lot at the very beginning? Cos... I love being loved and love to love... =/

The year end curse has gotten worse this year, but still... Something sweet came up unexpectedly, which I would like to share... I know, too many about Kevin for the past 3 years... Now, it's about me... and people who still care...

On the 3rd December 2010, it's my niece's Full Moon Party + Mum's Birthday party... Kevin did turned up, which I would like to sincerely thank him for such a great heart to my family and Chloe. Though he only left the gift to my bro and gone. I didn't even see his shadow...

So... I reached home, with hundreds of people greeted me "Where's Kevin? Where's ur bf?"... I ran up to my room, locked... and cried... Asking God why would he do this to me? And left all the questions for me to answer. Left all the loneliness and doubts for me to suffer...

The "Duo" then came trying to bring fun to my Friday night, they were laughing and teasing Miffy looks funny and all... Knowing that they just wanna see me smile... I braved up and smiled...

We went down and ate some of the delicious food served and off we go to the club.

Costmetic can't even cover the crying eyes... Miffy, muacks!

On the way, the jam was soooooo bad... we were stucked for an hour at Batu Caves, thanks to the "transformers"

Thanks to Nic who managed to got us, buy 1 free 1 even if it's past midnight...

Slightly tipsy

The girls made fun of Nic

And they made us take picture

This is the FMLest part, that fella brought the Flaming Lamborghini and I was really drunk after that... THANK U! (no thank u actually)

And so they made me finished it, I wanted to but it taste super yucky!!!

So he helped and look at the face "Errr now I know how it tastes"

Blur eyes, still got "longkang"... Hahaha...

Lily my love

I'm so in loveeeeeeeeee ahaha

And so, thanks to Nic for the Ribena... Cannot go on drinking alcohol anymore...

And we got hotter and steamy too =/

We lick... Okay.. I have to lick bottles now... Cos I'm single...n

I wanna kick this girl...

Ooohh lala...nnnn

I wasn't "sucking" but... Whatever it is la... Say more wrong more!

Lovely!!! Awww....

Lily had to drive my car as I was swinging like a monkey in the car...

Blast the music at 22... Normally the loudest I can bear is 12... =/

Trying to camwhore neng neng pic but end up laughing like mad

Fail AGAIN

I have another 3 celebrations, will post it all up... SOON, stay tuned!

2010-12-09T00:25:00.000+08:00

The Friends and The Trust

It's sad to see you like this, my heart aches... Wake up Kevin... Wake up from all the mistakes that you've done in the past.

Learn to appreciate people around you!!! What's wrong with you???

My friend is not here to help you if you don't appreciate her help!! She is so well known for her good temper, and yet... You managed to make her angry! Can you please wake up??? She only talk to you for a short period also cannot tahan your temper, I've lived with your temper for close to 3 years =)

Another way round, she sees me more than you do, and still... She never give up on our friendship.

Whose temper is bad... It's obvious!

She choose not to tell me earlier because she still trying to trust and don't want me to know the "real" you, you are the Kevin that I've been telling her, good, nice, friendly, loyal and honest... But she is tired and upset with you also... She's not even a friend of yours, why do you choose to tell her bad things about me? Most of them are not true... You want people to agree with you? Sympathy you? And hate me???

Friendship and trust don't come easy, not one word will change people's mind on me... The trust I gained from her is so much more than one word can spoil it.

I choose to still avoid the truth of why you left me... Though I know the real reason is you are now the OWNER of GT PROSHOP @ SUNWAY... Capable, bright future and famous... I want to leave good memories...

I want to keep ONLY good memories, the Kevin who has been honest, simple, loving, appreciative and caring...

Not the person who tell how much money I've spent, not paying phone bills and have no rights to ask for a transfer now (its u who want to be my main line... I can afford RM20/mth... No need use your subline. I can live without C&K heels, but it's you who is ego and want to show people how much u can spend on me. I was very independent, not close with my family, never use skin care/cosmetic... It's you... Who started all these and now... You talk bad about me to my friends...

You think yourself if what you are doing is right thing to do...

2010-12-08T10:18:00.000+08:00

Finally, I've come to a stage whereby I start to understand

... that it all happened cos... He has his own business, as what I predicted much more earlier before all these things happened.

He is exposed to more options and confidence level eventually boost-up.

Who is Penny Ong when he can find 100x better girl than her? Right?

So I stopped crying, I stop all the thinking that I've been having for the past 10 days.

I started to accept the fact that, he's just bored of me...

I might be one of the facts that caused this, I encouraged him with all my heart and soul, to do something that brings benefit to his future.

I once told him when he was really really thinking to do it or not... even if one day you've succeeded and you've forgotten me, it's okay. So long, dream achieved, and you are successful then, all that we are struggling now (back then) won't gone wasted.

I rest assured that I'll be here, thru good times and bad times, and pray for his success.

I'm still doing it.

One of days in the past week, I wanted to ruin his life so badly, I wanted to curse him. But I hold back, I told myself that I can't do this him. No matter what the reason is, I can't do this... Maybe I'm still unable to think of out the box, but with so many supports and concerns from my friends, I should be able to move on sooner than I thought.

Call me weak... Call me stupid... This is me...

2010-12-07T14:49:00.000+08:00

1 week has passed, the wound is still fresh

How are you lately? It seems forever since I last saw you... And it seems so long ago I heard your calm and soft voice calling me... Lao Po...

Hope you are doing good.

She has told me what you've told her, yes, it's indeed very very painful.

Finally I know, in these 3 years, everything was not real, it's all fake.. Care, Love, Concern, Attention, and Promises.. are all fake...

I have no choice but to admit... I got fooled... by you

2010-12-07T01:56:00.000+08:00

2 in a row Birthday Celebration

I never feel so precious in my entire life before... I spent most of my birthday with my bfs...

I admit, I always give exclusive priority to my bf... But, I'm so lucky that this year, when I met an end of my 3 years relationship, all my friends came up to surprise me with all sorts of things...

You name it that a boy could do, my girls can do so much better!

Flowers? Check
Pendant? Check
Cosmetic? Check
Body Care? Check
Surprise Birthday celebration? Check

I didn't expect anything, but the presence of them are just as precious as anything can be.

I know they are all tired, I can see from the face, but they were never giving up in entertaining me.

We ate, we drank...

Though I didn't leave with a smile but I put all your efforts in my heart and I will remember this forever.

I dunno how to thank you all for the wonderful "everything"...

Someone unexpectedly sms'ed me to concern about my failed relationship, I'm glad too, thanks =) ... Not new target but who knows right? haha

I think I will really really learn to start a new life, I will learn to let go, and start hating and cursing him to suffer for the rest of his life... No, just kidding.... He will get his "bou yeng"... I trust God will know how to treat people like this...

Good Night!

2010-12-06T18:22:00.000+08:00

I Had Enough.... Thanks to Lily...

I finally wake up now...

Though I might still feels sad and all, but this is it, my limit on you.

You are such an asshole, FUCKER!

Go on, live with lies and sorrows...

I'm real, I'm honest, and my people are around me when I need them... Look at yourself NOW!

2010-11-09T11:04:00.000+08:00

Longest Hiatus Ever

I feel bad for abandoning my blog, so many things happened in this 1 month (or more), I'm not able to pen it all here for my own sake.

Only to realize I still owe my blog for the Penang trip. So... Here goes!

Lily was late (again...) so we ended up reaching Jln Ipoh for breakfast @ 9am++ and then we started our journey all the way to north with our new pal... Ms. Garmin hahaha. Okay, I've never used a GPS before, so it's something really new and fun to me.

We arrived Penang around 3pm, we spent approximately 5hrs on the highway but it felt like nothing at all cos we just couldn't stop talking and laughing, we arrived at the hotel, it's not bad, they've got a Samsung LCD (huge one) and a really comfy and bed for us. No bathtub though, just shower but it's good for us cos besides the jacuzzi tub at The Northam Suites, I really don't enjoy bathtub in any other hotels.

It's the Flamingo Beach Hotel @ Tanjung Bungah. Please go to www.booking .com for cheaper rates.

I'm free on that day, so I called up one of my friends from Teamcity and he brought us to this place for roti bakar (toast) + Kopi cham Milo ping (Coffee + Milo over ice)

And after that, we went to the Gurney hawker, nothing seems good there but since Lily hardly visit Penang, we decided to go. A quick dinner and we went back to hotel. We were so bored, we rolled left right front back the bed and tuned to the available Astro channels and gave up. We took our car keys, went out to ta pao some snacks and beers. We brought it to the pool side and enjoyed our night there, facing the beach. The sound of the waves were really really relaxing.

On the 2nd day, we woke up early to meet my client, she dropped me off and I continued my meeting with a bunch of strangers but the result was good, it's worth driving there afterall.

And then my friend offered to host us to a couple of places to eat, lets see;

By far, this is the best asam laksa ever, seriously!

Then to another shop nearby for the famous lobak

Uncle: Oi u KL girls stop taking pics at my store!!

Lily: Yayaya wait... one more only lah

Penny: Omg why so sour??? Wth is this?

Lily: I behtahan d la... iyerr

Jelly jelly

I posted this before on my previous trip with Veron, I came back for more nin gou!! Yummmz

But this time round, I had to wait... for so long

After that, it rained heavily and we went back to the hotel, chilled out awhile, the rain stopped and we went down to the lobby and saw the lovely pool... We couldn't resist it but we weren't well prepared, we didn't have any swimsuits so we walked around and... We decided to just buy a set from the souvenir shop, that's how spontaneous we are!

Let's end the post with...

Bye all... =D

2010-10-31T00:25:00.000+08:00

Happy Halloween Not So Happy

With my bf ever busy schedule lately, I'm off with a wedding lunch with Lily, it's her friend's wedding, I don't even know that person but her bf couldn't make it due to some pantang larang of his grandma who have just passed on. So I sat in as her "partner"...

As Lily had to send her mum home after the lunch, on our way back to her house, she told me that her nephew is hosting a BBQ party at her house... Oh that sounds great, I asked if we could just join??? And so we bbq'ed and ate so full.

While I though the happening day was going to be ended, while Lily sending me home, right infront of my house, another bestie of us called to go PARTY, I was so thrilled to attend a Halloween party... Lily's bf said ok to go with her, and Kevin was coming to my house that moment. I had the greatest plan on head and guess what...

Something happened... I'm just not in the mood anymore... I think this is what Halloween is about yeah? Treats or Threat? Nobody is going to understand... All I could say is... I'm speechless...

Enjoy partying girls!

2010-08-11T11:14:00.000+08:00

Hang on Penny!! One more to go!

If you haven't already know, I'm down with food poisoning (i think so), fever and sprained my neck.

I'm leaving for Penang tomorrow to see a client, but this is different cos I'll be going with Lily. We planned to whack food like no tomorrow but I guess it's not possible already due to my condition now.

We are planning to leave at 7am tomorrow, god bless us safe trip please.

We'll be staying at The Flamingo Hotel, Tg. Bungah! It does look great from the website, the actual condition is for us to find out during our stay there.

Will blog more when I'm bag with lots of great pictures??? For sure! With my new 8mp mobile phone, there's no reason for me to not bring back some good pics.

Wish me luck and I hope I'll get well soon...

2010-08-08T10:45:00.000+08:00

My Own

It's been awhile =) I know...

I just got back from a 24hrs SGP trip, I flew all the way to SGP to attend one meeting, sounds like a business women, no? The changes of my client, partially affecting me very badly, this client is also my ex-company. They are so well known for their management changes!

On 3rd August 2010, Kevin pick me up from my office to LCCT, to catch a flight to SGP.

I arrived Changi Terminal 1 @ 2200hrs (depart at 1950hrs), the flight wasn't delayed, but they couldn't land due to massive traffic at the airport, so we were rounding on top of the airport for like..almost an hour. That's not all, I waited for the my bag at the belt, and it was not where to be seen!! Someone came and asked if I wanna go over the lost and found counter to look for it, god... JINX!

Not too bad, I found, walked up to the pick up area, my sis was there to pick me up, and drove to another terminal to wait for my BIL, and they sent me back to my hotel. I arrived at hotel around 1am++ I was very very tired but I couldn't fall asleep at all, blame the bed? Or blame that person who shared a room with me? Whatever...

I had to woke up 730am to get myself prepared for the meeting at 10am, we were late so we skipped our breakfast but my client are the best client on earth, they drove us out to this McD located near Commonwealth, with a very beautiful landscape!!! That's what we should have here in KL.

Then lunch was at SCC (Singapore Cricket Club), say me "sua gu"... I've never been to a club like this, so many restrictions, nobody is allowed to use the mobile phone in the club!! No kids, no maids, no laptop... Yes... And my client said that there was once during the olden days, there's a sign saying "Dogs and Chinese are not allowed".

We wrapped up the meeting at 430pm and I went back to the hotel to pack my stuff and get changed. Went for dinner before he sent me to the airport. I'm sincerely very thankful for everything my sis and BIL done, otherwise I would have felt like I was all alone out of the country.

I'm back now, with many more good stuff!

If you are following me on my Facebook (not twitter cos I don't have one), you should have known about my new gadgets, a new phone and a new laptop. Kevin have spent a great amount on these. My Samsung phone is coming 2 yrs of service, it has no function, the camera wasn't as good as I thought it would be. But I've never complaint anything at all, I thought I've used to it anyway. But he thought it's time to get something I like out of nowhere on a Saturday! Without doing much survey, he brought me there and just pick one I like! I thought of Blackberry but it wasn't that nice and the function is not what I want, I'm not that IT savvy though.

And we went PC fair yesterday after my shopping activities, and I was just looking left right up down, thinking that he is only surveying for price and etc, what I3 I5, this and that... I had no idea at all. So I was being a total bimbo, just stare elsewhere until he paid! I started panicking... But too late, I couldn't say a word whole night, I didn't even thank him cos I just couldn't believe what had happened... Now that I'm happily using my new laptop, I realize, this is not a dream, I've never own a laptop before and he made it for me =)

2010-07-26T11:54:00.000+08:00

Learning process

Ever since I picked up yoga, I feel that I'm moving to a slower motion in everything I do.

Less hot temper, better concentration, and sort of better control of my mind, body and soul (so yoga this quote).

Lately, I've been living like a single girl, not that I've broke up with Kev, just that he's too busy to be there.
Nothing I can do, complaining and arguing won't help too. At one point, I just hope that what he's doing is good for his future, at least I think it is!

When we first started, he visits me almost every day, then alternate days, then only weekends, and now... Sometimes only Sat morning or none.

Honestly, I do feel this changes affect my thinking and expectation towards this relationship but thank god, I'm slowly adapting too. I've learnt to say it's okay, I've learnt to not feel lonely when he's not around, I've learnt that he's busy for good, and I definately need to minimize throwing temper at him.

I hope he will not feel the pressure from me, and I also hope that he won't feel that I'm expecting him to be there for me all the time, I just wish to be more independant.

By making all the above realistic, I've learnt to be lazy also, I spent my time sleeping or watching PPS at home. I know that's very boring but well... I don't wanna spend so much out there and that's my only entertainment.

During weekdays, I'll go yoga classes whenever I'm free, maybe gather with the girls for dinner or yum cha. Do you have girl friends like that? I never had... When we have a bit of money we'll go shopping, when we are broke, she'll come over, sit on my bed to watch drama, then go eat and all...

I'm just trying to live a balance lifestyle, I club, I yoga, I paktoh, I hangout with gfs, I work and I travel...

Speaking of travel, I'm heading to SGP next week, then Penang in 3rd week of August 2010 (another crazy talk non stop and eat non stop with Lily). Did you know that we talked all the way from Batu Caves - Mid Valley - Sri Kembangan - Batu Pahat... NON STOP!!!

And we were so daring, when we were on our way home, we saw this billboard of chicken rice ball, immediately we made a decision to drop by Melacca, that's how crazy we are, two girls! We ate like pig, chicken rice, asam laksa, chendol and zoom home (continue talking non stop still). That few hours seems like nothing to us!

I'm amazed thinking back about it!!!

I can already know that "someone" is shaking his head again... hehehe

2010-07-13T10:25:00.000+08:00

I choose to be quiet

I've said too much lately, I've tell my heart out to many people but non has given me a good respond (or just that I feel it's not good enough?)

I choose to smile, I choose to say I'm okay cos I know, no matter how hard I try to express my feelings, nobody is going to take it seriously.

I even regret for being truthful, yes... How could a person regret for being truthful?? Everyone wants to hear something nice... That's what I trust...

Of course something is bothering me, I've over spent this 2 months over something I didn't expect to be spending, I'm completely out of budget now and I just wish that July and August will go very soon... But there comes Sept and Oct which I'll be spending again... Guess the word easy doesn't exist in my life at all.

Moving back to my daily life, I'm still practising yoga, slowly it changes my life, yoga is not spiritual, unless you want it to be but somehow, it does make some changes in me, if only someone notices.

I wish to share some of the yoga poses that I've learnt in my next post, just for my own viewing and learning to pose better.

-Yoga is NOT about how flexible or inflexible you are, learn to do it the RIGHT way-

Regards,
Penny

2010-07-02T16:34:00.000+08:00

Vernice's Wedding 1 @ Batu Pahat

I have to say that it was a most unpleasant trip ever.

I offered my car and Lily offered herself to be the driver.

I would like to share some of her pre wedding photoshoots, why?
Honestly, I've seen so many pre wed photoshoots but I can tell you, I'm in love with these;

Okay, seriously, damn pretty these photos, look at the mood, background, gowns, expressions, PERFECT!!!

And please see below for the victims (Heng Tais)... Before this, the bride and bridegroom informed us that there shouldn't be any "punishment" ie; wasabi, chilli, mustard any shitty stuff... it has to be a HAPPY GAME.

I squeezed my brain to think of something very torturing yet not sour or hot or bitter....

And so... Poor fellas swore they'll not eat anything sweet for at least 1 month, the power of Penny Ong...

Okay sorry, I'm normally not that evil, everyone knows;

Bride's mummy, bride's aunts and the leng lui ji muis.... How often to you get this kind of quality la??? Hahaha Heng Tais told the bride that her ji mui all damn pretty...

In the next post, I'll be featuring more of the torturing part, of sorry, not torturing, not at all.. They "enjoyed" it I guess.

And I really need to jot it down here what Lily and I have gone thru, ups and downssss but we managed to go thru them and come home in one piece (two pieces)...

Stay tuned!!

2010-06-24T15:32:00.000+08:00

Yoga

I've attended a couple of yoga classes in Celebrity Fitness, True Fitness and Fitness First which were enough to catch my interest in Yoga.

But, I've recently joined BeYoga and I'm proud to say, the teachers there managed to change my perception towards Yoga.

Now, to me, Yoga isn't about stretching, flexibility, strength in posing, how well you can pose and such, which I'm sure these are the things that you might want to achieve in doing Yoga.

However, this teacher, Vivianne, she changed completely of what I expected and wanted to achieve by practising Yoga. I don't see how much I sweat, I don't see if I've lost weight, or I'm getting more flexible. I praise myself and thank myself when I'm able to control my body better. That's what Yoga means to me. She said, her best student is not the student who can pose perfectly, there's no competition here. The best student is the one who knows how to rest, breathe and know their body well enough. I couldn't agree more on that.

I admit that none of the teachers have taught me this in my previous Yoga classes in fitness centres, and I always opt to pose better, forgetting the breathing and which muscle should work, all the time.

She sees improvement in me yesterday (my 3rd week with them), and I told her, I appreciate the way she have been teaching, it's not about how I pose, it's all about how the pose is being achieved, it's the process, the steps working together with the right muscle to use and breathing, I said. She's amazed and nodded. Some may find her classes boring becos you don't get to work around too much (some people find achievement in working around) but I like learning and I want to do things the correct way.

She even said my body loves yoga and they are meant to practise yoga, that's a very good compliment. During our little chat after work, I was really overwhelmed of how she praises my hard work. My poses were so nicely done =)

Okay, guess it's a bit too much too brag about my small hobby but I'm sure you guys can understand that I hardly have any interest before this.

On Monday, I attended a class, lead by another teacher who has different style of teaching, she asked us to do King Dancer pose but, being all noob, we didn't know how to do, I told Vivianne about this and she said "Nvm... I'll lead coming Monday's class and I will teach you to do this pose cos it's a reallllyyy beautiful pose, and if I ever forget, tell me beginning of the class and I'll put that in on the spot for you!". I looked like a kid wanting a lollipop, I nooded happily and said "Yes yes, will definately remind you, I've been dreaming to do it!"

So, what is King Dancer???

Nice? It's not easy but I promised myself, I'm gonna achieve this pose someday =)

I receive a lot of support by my bf, and friends, I'm thankful. Kevin caught me by surprise, he went to Mid Valley early in the morning to get me the right Nike attire for my Yoga classes, they are pink in color =) and cost a bomb. Thank you so much for supporting me, I know it's really expensive (fees and accessories).

2010-05-17T11:16:00.001+08:00

Girls...

I think I've had enough of food... Over the past few weeks, I've been eating like mad, yes I do remember I'm on diet and I'm trying to balance it back with a little exercise okay?

I've been visiting the gym lately, just got myself a 1 month trial at Menara Axis Fitness First.

What's best on a Friday night? Partying? Probably I still like parties but I do like what I did last Friday.

After work, I head down to Uptown to do my nails with Lily, and then both of us head back home for a shower. Since we intended to skip dinner, she suggested to come over my place to hang out =) I think it was a best idea ever.

So both of us rolled up in my bed and giggled till wee hours. We watched Taiwan drama, we criticized, we laughed, and I sure had a really good time.

She's always my partner in crime (double trouble). We make fun of everything, our jokes can be silly but we really enjoy it... At least we've been enjoying our silly jokes. There were this time were our bf decided to come out for a double date, I just couldn't believe how we ignored the two guys and we just laughed our ass off during the dinner, and both of them decided to start talking about business/work, Lily's bf is not good in canto so he said something wrongly, which ended up making Lily and I laughing even harder.

You must be thinking how crazy this two person are, how can they laugh all day and night? How can they maintain endless conversation, I have no idea but I'm loving it!

The last time I laughed to often was during my time at this Telco company with my dearestest Yvonne, now, with Lily who gets along with Yvonne, I'm just proud to say, you girls are my love!

2010-05-14T16:04:00.000+08:00

Penang Makan Trip Part 2

Lets continue with the final part of my past Penang trip.

During our previous trip in 2009, after our dinner, we drove around the city and we saw this place, right infront of the Ferry Port. There were so many people dining there and not forgetting the queue also.

Salted egg yolk crab

This is definately the best that I've ever had

Salad Prawn

This is amazingly good also!!

Steamed Fish

The fish is fresh and steamed to perfect

How's the display of this bridal house?

It catches my attention, all the time

After our dinner, we drove back uphill Batu Feringghi to meet up with Veron for a drink @ Sunset Bar.

You just wont know how we had to pull our legs off the sand each time stepping on the beach, wondering why? Cos we didn't know how to get into this place, so we walked from one end of the beach to another at close to midnight. But it was fun though we only get to sit there for like 30mins =(

And took this picture

It was such a waste that I didn't get to drink due to some reason and I wanted to stay longer, next time maybe?

So, Sunset bar ended the Saturday night for all of us.

Good Morning view from our room!

And a Good Morning Penny with lazy eyes

And a Good Morning couple =)

So we checked out from the hotel at about 11am and head further uphill of Batu Feringghi to snap some nice photos.

Since the scenary is awesome, might as well add a model in it, liddat?

Natural is very natural... Cos I was "really" falling down and ended up with all sands all over my dress

Then we drove down slightly for another feel of the beach

All artistic

LFK thought it's cool to have a shawl, winter sonata style

(that was MY shawl)

We left our footprints there (pls ignore my cacat toes)

After this, I joined Veron and friends for a fantastic ending of Penang Makan Trip

We had so many meals for lunch, I'm sorry I've forgotten to take pictures to share with you guys cos I was busy attacking the goodies

We bought this "nin kou" damn nice, it's so crispy and the batter was really good

Yumzzz

It's time to say Goodbye to Penang, honestly... Sad to say that didn't enjoy myself much during this trip due to many reasons but it was a good food trip, thanks to Veron for letting us tag along with her friends.

2010-05-10T10:31:00.001+08:00

Penang Makan Trip (4th)

Let the pictures do the talking, in case you are very interested to try any of this food, let me know, I'll guide you over =)

The wasn't so good on Saturday, it was drizzling in the morning

Few things that I cannot missed every single Penang Trip

(BF)

BKT + tai chow in the morning at Gurney

This is their signature chicken floss vege

(BF)

First time trying, fried chicken with caramel sauce

-GOOD-

(BF)

BKT, not one of the best but not bad

(BF)

Yam rice to go with BKT

(BF)

Mr. Sunshine came back to work and we had to drink Coca Cola

100 Plus - thirst quencher

Char Koay Teow @ Pulau Tikus

(LUNCH)

That's all for now... Coming up next, will be featuring some new places that we've never been for superdelicious SEAFOOD and also road side snacks =)

I'm really ashamed to admit Photography is one of my main subject during my college time, I do like Photography but... I hardly take photos cos I don't have a proper functioned camera, please don't comment on my skills ya, photos taken for fun only =) unless good comments... Hahahaha

2010-05-05T12:19:00.000+08:00

Sushi Zen @ The Gardens, Mid Valley

I went to Penang past weekend with Kevin and Calver. It was such a fab-trip I must say. And the best thing was, we confirmed the trip just 2 days before! You don't need me to remind you how many times we've been there but....... We are loving Penang even more after this trip =)

This post is not about Penang but... Sushi Zen...

On Thursday night after work, my babe Lily and I went to Mid Valley to stock up some drinks and snacks for my Penang trip. And we stopped by Sushi Zen as per her request;

Cold Green Tea Soba served with Soba sauce, blended radish and seaweed

(First time trying chilled soba, it's actually very nice)

Niku Udon, as delicious as ever =)

Since Lily's soba is too plain, she ordered a piece of grilled salmon with fish roe, I love it to the MAX, mad love this salmon, it melts in your mouth but quite pricey though, around RM15 for a small piece.

It was such a great dinner, and I always enjoy her company, cos we have too many things in common and we both can laugh all day (or night) long.

2010-05-04T10:48:00.000+08:00

KISSATEN @ Jaya One

One fine day, my colleague and I wanted to enjoy our lunch time, and so we decided to drive-out to Jaya One. We arrived there thinking of Secret Recipe but it's closed down already =/

So we walked up and down looking for good food... So we came by this menu out of nowhere and immediately we nodded and walked up to find out more

The drinks they are offering

Set Lunch + Dinner

Need me to tell you what are these???

So we ordered a Chawanmushi

Olio Spaghetti

ABC Pasta

The food were really really great. We spent almost 15mins to decide what to eat, they offers a wide range of good looking food which makes you wanting to eat everything that's showing on the menu.

Both of us enjoyed! I hope to visit this place again someday and try out some Japanese food instead of spaghetti @ Japanese Restaurant =) but... The bill came up to rather expensive which made us not visiting this restaurant for lunch anymore...

I love this salt and pepper set, cos they are really mini in size!

2010-04-29T17:10:00.000+08:00

All About Good Food

Last weekend, Kevin decided to wake up early (once in a blue moon) and came to fetch me all the way to Sri Petaling for............... DIM SUM

This is my favourite, it looks like an ordinary bun (pao) not until you explore what's inside!!! It's a must try! They have glutinous rice inside (loh mai kai), salted egg yolk, shitake, and other goodies.

Century egg, minced meat porridge, smooth and yummy

And lots of other ordinary dim sum

And this, both of us didn't quite like it, butter roll =s

2010-04-20T17:09:00.003+08:00

Penny the Professional Photographer

It has been 3 consecutive Saturdays that we drove uphill for Starbucks.

Last week was unusual cos we had a special guest all the way from JB.

It was meeting up with you for the first time, and missed out taking a photo with you.

However, lets allow me to share some of the pics that I've taken the week before last week =)

It's super duper nice and professional okay??? I don't even need a SLR cos I'm a genius... Ok la, just syok sendiri only...

2010-04-02T10:53:00.003+08:00

Penny Can Cook

Yes, I can cook VERY WELL.

Hahahaha... Self claimed only, unless the person I cook this dinner for also say nice laa... =/

I was browsing at my picture library for this restaurant we dined at SS2, serving Teo Chew food.

Before I present the Teo Chew Restaurant's goodies, lets take a look at Chef Penny's dinner for 2. Since it's a dinner for 2, we only had 2 dishes... Make sense ya?

Stir fried chicken breast with potato in "special" sauce

Grilled salmon with garlic and butter

Okay... back to this restaurant that I initially planned to post about. It's located in SS2, I don't recall the shop's name out of a sudden, but if you are interested for some "ching ching dei" food, you sure need to visit this place!

Seafood Porridge - fish maw, squid, prawn, scallops, and fish

Seafood Mee Sua - fish, prawn and squid

Fried Foo Chuk - nothing special though

But in our 2nd visit, we order the baby octopus, I think it was awesome with the chilli sauce.

Until I get a new camera, I'll blog more, for the time being, please stay with this super random blog.

Take Care Bye

2010-03-30T17:51:00.005+08:00

Hello Genting

Though Genting is very near to my house, but still, I hardly go there.

It's not only the curvy roads but I just don't know what I can do there. I like the weather but I don't like theme parks, and I don't like to walk too far. I don't see anyone sending me up for a drink but Kevin =/

Saturday he came a little late than usual cos he was busy cheating me. He told me he's sending cheque over to Sunway and had a little discussion and stuff. And in actual, he was busy pimp'ing my ride!

When I first gotten my car, I've always wanted to install bodykits but as usual I was only saying for the sake of saying cos everybody else were talking about it.

Anyway, take a look lah

After our usual shopping, we thought of going genting for a drink! It does sounds crazy to me but I think he feels okay to drive up there for Starbucks' Latte... Maybe :/ We arrived there around 11pm and I think in 30mins time we drove back home.

_____________________________________

Let's take a peep on my diet plan...

Lose weight? Yes? No? Still the same? Or gained weight?

2010-03-23T15:00:00.003+08:00

The Blackout

I slept really early last night, by 11pm. Not very early but earlier than any other day.

But wtf I still feel sleepy now. Maybe I'm too upset.

Whatever...

At times like this MSN is trying to test my patience by showing other's I'm in offline mode.

Now what's your problem????

Some already recover from this "blackout" but I'm still the SAME, why?

Oh wait, put aside the damn "blackout"... I'm missing YOU already.

Look!!!! Who's that???

Are they cute or what????? *muacksss*

Last Sunday we had a family dinner, for my sister's future in law meet up, 12 of us gathered for a dinner @ KL's.

First time in history, Kevin and I arrived very much earlier so we dropped by KLCC and all I could think off from KLCC is Sun Moulin and Miki Cheesecake @ Isetan. Thinking of that, I think it's been ... 2-3 years since I last had this... Time flies and I still miss the time working at the telco company =)

Luck must have been with me cos this is the last ONE... LAST...

Last but not least, manicure of the week!

Glittery white

2010-03-19T12:04:00.004+08:00

Love, love, love... I want your love

Feeling all gaga and stuff today (wtf gaga is supposed to mean anyway?)

Hmmm maybe it's Friday? And my stuff are pretty well on track?? I think I'm sensitive to my boss actually, yeah I'm serious.

I never like wild animals, maybe I've grown up from Hello Kitty? No I'm not old yet.

I'm ending my 3rd week of diet and I'm pretty good with the results, my face is slightly slimmer, and waist too... =) Any present for me? No? Damn... Cold blooded friends!

I enjoyed the past few weekends, thanks to my bestest dearest LFK, he had everything planned to make me happy continuosly. Not forgetting making me angry also (maybe he planned this also...)

Nothing much to update, I'm pretty excited, another sibling of mine getting married... So the list of people getting married in 2010 is growing! It's a great year isn't it? I'm sure it is lah!

We have bestie, we have BFF, we have ZeFunny, and now my Sis... How nice?

I'm currently keep chopping my off my hair cos it is really spoiled and damaged, I wanna cut all the chemical treated hairs off... And not to mention I'm having terrible hair loss =(

It's weekend again, what is your plan? I don't know mine but I know it's gonna be GREAT!!!

LFK I miss you already!

The Zippa Adventure

Sun Moulin's Strawberry Cake

And super expensive Yogurt from Coffee Bean

More C&K coming up next week

Rara ah ah ah, rama ramama, gaga ooh lala... Want your "best" romance!

2010-03-17T10:31:00.002+08:00

We've come a long way

This post is a bit late.

Actually I thought it's our 3rd anniversary cos it feels like we have been together longer than 2 years. But no, it's 2nd anniversary.

I remember it was so puppy love when we first met.
This guy bought flowers on our first date! Yes, flowers!!!

And it all started very quickly and thank god it didn't end quickly *choiiii*
We went thru ups and downs and yet we are still together.

Manythings have changed, but I hope our love remains...??

Happy 2nd Anniversary

2010-03-08T17:41:00.005+08:00

Happy Weekend but shitty DUKE HIGHWAY

I'm staying nearby Batu Caves and I'm working in Jalan Semangat, PJ (next to Jaya 33).

The distance that I need to travel everyday is getting more and more painful. I used to take Jalan Kuching - Jalan Duta - Damansara Heights- Section 16 - Office

But after awhile, Jalan Kuching became really really congested. And Veron thought me to use Duke Highway.

And guess what??? I had a fuss free driving to work for 2 months... And now... It is getting worse by day. Since 2010, the traffic has been really bad, sometimes back up till even before the Duta interchange... It's MAD JAM... But yet I hope it is still better than Jln. Kuching cos I'm paying rm2 ma!

Today is exceptional cos the jam was unusual, i arrived at office close to 10am, and i left my house at 7:45am... FML!!!

Something amused me though...

Look at his Duke Highway sticker... (too small huh?)

Nah, enlarged version

Hahaha got it? Tell me it's funny!!

Okay, anyway... I had another great weekend... A lot of good food!!! Don't worry I've not forgotten my diet plan ya!

I just love weekends like that... We had my favourite Taiwanese cuisine at The Gardens on Saturday, then Nando's for dinner *burb*...

And... Sunday, Dragon-I... I dunno how you guys find the food there, I simply love every single stuff there, the "la mian" was damn good!!!!!!!!! (I just mentioned myself i had carbo..) And a light dinner to end the beautiful weekend =(

I know often times I'm only complaining this and that but I still remember the good people and good things around me =) Love u...

2010-03-05T14:31:00.002+08:00

我好累

2010-03-04T15:43:00.002+08:00

Miss the carbo

...so much! I miss rice, I miss bread, I miss cookies, I miss so many things that I cannot eat now. Sugarless, carbo-less... But I hope it's worth while :/

Time for my sugar free organic soya milk... Yumss...(not so yummy though)

2010-03-02T10:00:00.002+08:00

What a feeling

I think I'm over worked and I think I need a holiday badly before I raise the white flag again. I'm really feeling anxious and nervous all the time, a sign of over worked I guess. I'm thinking of work, work and work all the time.

Worrying this will not turn out fine, that one is not done, this one dunno how to do, that one no idea, this one deadline coming up and I'm not prepared at all... The list just won't stop anywhere!!!

I can't sleep, I can't eat (good for my diet I guess, fml) and I feel really moody all the time. I am pressuring myself to do everything I THINK I can. It's not easy to switch to a whole new environment at work... It's very very difficult. I have so much to complaint but I learn to stop complaining that much cos people around me just won't understand what are the things that running in my mind, what are the things that makes me moody, nobody will understand.

I wish for once, I can finish up everything and go for a holiday? If I can't finish what's on my plate (still adding on all the time), I don't think I will enjoy the holiday also.

I'm tired, I wish I don't need to work anymore. I know I've been a workaholic, a person who have high hopes and dreams in career, but no more now. I think I'm looking things at different view now. Maybe lesser hopes will make my life easier and less hectic?

Gotta go back to work... *sigh*

2010-03-01T16:56:00.002+08:00

So responsive over my diet plan???

I think it's time, it's really the time to start my diet plan.

You know what? I am really starting it today but I never thought soooooo many people are responding over this. Why ya? Am I really that fat?

I think I'm really fat but just don't get it cos some people kept saying "No laaaaaa where got? Yo are just nice bla bla bla". And I do know some of you really tell me which part of my body is really fat, thank you so much, I really appreciate honest people. At least you give honest comments for me to improve, and I mean you don't want your friend to look like a walking BKT right?

So here I am, taking a step to the diet plan, nothing to shout out now cos it's Day 1.

Breakfast, none, I know it's unhealthy but I'm not feeling well, so no appetite.
Lunch, half boiled eggs + organic soya milk.
Dinner, what's for dinner? Hmmm... lets see what I can eat later at home...

2010-03-01T10:00:00.005+08:00

GXFC has come to the end =(

I never like GXFC before, I used to hate it so much that I find no purpose of the celebration at all!!!

I was enjoying every single second of it

But this year, I'm enjoying every bit of GXFC, minus the damn sick... Everything else was perfect!

On 13th, I've got a super duper surprise from Kevin, it was to start the beautiful week ahead!!! Or probably the rest of the days until the next one??!!! Hehehe...

On 1st day of CNY, me and Kevin practices to be a vegan, so we stayed at my house during the noon and evening at his house. Not too bad cos I get to eat and take =/ a milo tin of kuih kapit, chips, and some cupcakes... He really made me like a super kiasu and tak tahu malu gf, anyway, no regrets cos I love to eat CNY goodies.

On 2nd day of CNY, my house had a little open house for the Ong's. Later in the noon we went to Tropicana City Mall for movies, so we practically stayed there from noon till midnight, went to the Thai restaurant for some kicking spicy Tom Yum and some Thai favourites. We watched Valentine's Day and All Well Ends Well, I totally loved Valentine's Day, I just love this kind of movies and the other CNY movie wasn't that good though.

The rest of the days in the CNY week was awesome, cos I practically shopped, eat good food, and Kevin just made this GXFC thing so magical.

Yesterday, I went for Veron's wedding gown fitting, it was really really exciting! She is so slim and everything looks so good on her! Omg... That makes me really depressing now. I'm glad she's happy that I was there to kepoh. She have choosen a couple of great gowns and costumes, it was all great and she's all ready for the photo shoot now.

By the way, I love my new pair of C&K... I'm having more and more into da C&K collection now, thanks to Kevin for spoiling me... Muackss

2010-02-10T09:58:00.002+08:00

The truth of yours truly

So lame right the title? Whatever it is...

I feel so funny whole morning, in fact since yesterday!

I saw my colleagues passing around this catalogue and talking about gifts to... to... your another half!

Okay, sorry if you think I'm weird, but I find pressure to visit people or to give them a gift... I'm just plain weird I know.

So, this morning, I came in sitting here thinking about him... Hmmmm... And someone (YOU KNOW WHO OK?) kept telling me I need to be a good girl... So... Here I am being a super good girl and picked something from that catalogue and ready to go visit you and your family...

Super kan cheong!

Okay, weirdo and kan cheong aside...

Over the weekend, he brought me out to shop for CNY, he managed to get me 2 dresses, 2 tops, 1 jeans, and a pair of heels. I am really glad he organize the shopping weekend, it's really thoughtful of him...

Had a hair cut (twice actually) but didn't get to color it, it's okay, clothes check, nails check, hair check, I'm ready for the GXFC!!!!

2010-02-03T10:16:00.002+08:00

Down...

I don't think any words can ever describe this feeling I'm feeling right now.

I don't know why my hands are shivering, I don't know why my head feels so heavy, I don't know why the body is freaking cold.

I am not able to concentrate at work now.

My boss is calling me like a pissed off customer calling TNB non stop to screw them.

Worse situation probably, cos she sighs... and sighs...

I hope all this will be gone soon... I wish I can go thru this month with a brave heart and blessings. I hope to overcome this issue soon, I know it's not easy but... I have no choice... You made me do this.

2010-02-02T16:39:00.001+08:00

My Dream in the Year of the Tiger

D.R.E.A.M.

Accordingly to the supersticious beliefs that if you are born in that particular year, that year is not a good year for you.

I couldn't agree more when I went thru a horrible year last year, year of the Ox... Yeah I'm old! FML to mid 20's!!!

Anyways, since this year is the year of Tiger... Roaarrr... I'm looking forward to a DREAM!!!
Dreaming to win Nuffnang's Run to Win Towards the Year of the Tiger GRAND PRIZE RM8,888 worth of dreams +RM1,888 cash prize!

Okay this is to narrow down my dreams to one, I cannot be having only one dream right??? Oh you do? Sorry I have plenty of them!

I wanna afford something to pamper myself after complaining for 3 years of my life, I want a holiday trip with luxury accomodation! Not necessary to be a far away destination, just like Xiaxue's recent Phuket trip... The suite that she stayed over with Mike was incredibly AWESOME! Private pool at the deck... The bathtub for 2... Owhh gosh...

Even with the "Everyone Can Fly", I'm still unable to afford a vacation.

I am feeling very very envious of people who have all their trips planned ahead for that particular year. It's definately a great idea cos besides sigh'ing and fml'ing all the way to the damn meeting or presentation, these people have all these trips motivating them to walk thru all the humps and waves.

I have nothing great to look forward in this year, never had...

Let me share with you something, one day my ex boss was telling me about the carrot method. My english is not one of the good ones, so I frowned when she said carrot out of nowhere in our business review meeting. Carrot means incentive like, and rod is the opposite. So you use "carrots" to motivate a person to do something and you don't force someone to do something with a "rod".

I've been at the highest of all, the 21st floor experience. Managing peoples, events, company's budget and such. I've been a fool at this Half Price company, being fooled like a donkey and end up forced down the road to resign. I've been this super egoistic person at this super huge office with nobody inside, the orange direct selling company.

I've been to interviews where most of the people asking HOW can you have so many years of working experience while you are only in your early 20's. How?? It hurts when people ask this but it's because I didn't get to study much, and I work hard like a cow to compensate back my limited education background! I keep working and working and working like mad slave, I never dare to fake an MC or anything like this cos I appreciate people who gives me a chance to be part of the company!

But what have I missed??? By now I have nothing!! After all these MNC that I've worked for, I ended up forgetting that I should be enjoying life and life is not all about working like a cow. Cos the year of the Ox has passed and I should be enjoying the year of the Tiger!
My dream is to escape from this working-like-a-cow's life to a.... Vacation at a luxury beach resort for 2!!!

(I'm not picky... Anywhere I'm fine)

2010-02-01T11:44:00.002+08:00

Tropicana Seafood Restaurant

Sorry I don't even know the name but it's located in Tropicana so I smartly assumed the name :/

This is one of the bestest meals cos it's FREE... Hehehe someone owed me a meal and here it goes...

"Yau mak" stir fried with fermented beancurd

Kam heong lala

Fried Mantao/bread
3C = Claypot Cheese Crab

The bill came up to around RM70 for 3 pax. Expensive? Not too sure but I loveeee crabs and seafood except for fish. But it's worth the portion and taste! Ambience abit teruk cos they were playing this black and white vcd of old school songs like "only you...can make this world seems right..." Super super tak boleh pakai!!!!

I know it's been sooo long since I posted my nails... You guys missed out so many nice designs before this but no worries, this is one of the best too!

2010-01-27T15:03:00.002+08:00

My Happy Moments

... is when I see you laugh with no worries in you.
... is when I rest on your chest watching movies.
... is when you hug me and smile at me.
... is when you smell my hair.

So many that I couldn't put them all here but... Sometimes there are unhappy moments and it's hard for us to walk thru... Maybe I find it difficult...

2010-01-25T09:13:00.005+08:00

Finally I've not changed

I've been planning to attend the wedding, for once and for all, meet up with the old collegemates and catch up abit. Though money does matters this month, been skipping a lot of lunch just to pay some annual expenses and ang pao for the newly wed.

But, I ended up didn't managed to go. For those who don't know why, I appreciate it that you don't ask, I don't wanna talk about it.

It wasn't a big issue but someone over reacted and put all the blames on me.

Lately, I found myself being scolded everywhere. Everyone seems to hate me alot. Many times I feel my life not worth living for. Someone came and brought colors to my life and someone also came and wash off the colors.

I feel so tired, frankly speaking, I don't even know if I still own a heart, I don't know how to be angry cos I'm so used to being scolded and blamed for nothing.

I don't wanna compare myself to anybody cos I know I've done my best. For everything I say or do, i think twice before doing or saying, afraid that I'll hurt people's feeling. But these people don't give shit about my feeling at all, they take things for granted, when I treat them good and so happens they are in bad mood, they say everything they want to say, they do whatever they want and later on they regret...

Think about it... I'm actually a human too, I don't scold you back doesn't mean I'm not hurt.

Something really cheer me up over the weekend, I saw horses in my neighbourhood, it belongs to my neighbour!

2010-01-14T09:33:00.004+08:00

Low battery

I woke up in the morning yesterday, feeling all great cos my colleague offered a ride to work, she's such a darling I tell you. But... she was late! Argh... So whatever, we were joking all the way to work and I thought it was a good start until we hit the office and work started to drown me. I had to rush a couple of days worth of work to complete within half day cos I had an event at Shangri-La Hotel... No it's not candle light dinner with bf, or buffet whacking with besties... For American Express Rewards Night... We were the appointed merchant that night and I had to be there for... I don't know...

So we left office very late cos we couldn't finish our work, rushing till we gone mad. Off we go at 4:30pm, traffic wasn't too good and we arrived at 6pm, got screwed by our beloved boss "OMG................. How late can you guys be???" I was totally pissed off and took a banquet chair, sat there.... Come on... We are tired and we were late because of??? Your work fucker!

There were Samsung, Philips, Machines, Slimming Sanctuary, Nokia, Mayflower as part of the participating merchant. Card members with all their lansi face "Nahh kiddo, I got 1 million points... see?" Hell yeah, I have no idea what's the difference between AMEX and other credit cards and I don't give a fuck cos I don't need any cards but my ATM card... OK? fml...

There were rich people everywhere, rich young couples, old couples but still very loving... "darling...chocolates for u... *wink*" "Oh sayang, let me carry this for u..." "dear... do you want this? I've plenty of points to redeem them =)" "Honey...drinks for u... from me"

I got really pissed seeing them... Like... Rich people only so sweet is it??? Poor people will start shouting at their wife and kids??? Is it??? You tell me la... How true my statements are?? I find it absolutely true... Seriously... Maybe... Money buys happiness... :/

I felt so small and useless standing there as a merchant will people around my age were there with the cocktail, delicious food, nice hair, slim body, nice dress, designer pouch, nice shoes, lovely sweet talks, laughing all the way, so cheerful and all that... But I only have my sour and sad face cursing fml all the way... I don't feel happy at any time of the day...

I met one of my friend (worst case)... She's a typical care-free person, she laughes, she giggles all the way all the time... What can I do to achieve that kind of happiness?? I doubt it'll ever happen...

Anyway, please meet my crazy colleague... She tied my hair like hers while I was busy rushing for my job one fine day, and I totally don't recall how she did it... And she insisted to take a photo with me... like this...

2010-01-04T11:16:00.004+08:00

2010 I'm hoping...

1. to let my nails to take a breather after 3 years of OPI colours... OMG 3 years already, cannot believe it how fast the clock ticks away.

2. to really really cut that 5kg down, fml.

3. to have more activities in my MID 20's... seriously... I need to party and get wild before I'm sitting there being called auntie... fml man.... MID 20's???????? Shit... Get me the bird nest now now now!!!! I wanna go travel!!!! Seriously...

4. to live happily everyday.

5. to have changes at work in order for me to stay longer or #6

6. to find a better job, with better environment, better people, better pay, better benefits and more professional job in a bigger company, MNC please.

7. to take up the language course that I've been talking about since 2 years ago.

8. to apply lotion before I sleep, everyday.

9. to get new cheap bag for work.

10. to get more clothes so I don't look like I'm wearing same shirt to work every single day, but different color!!!

11. to learn to be more fashionable, with the ting ting tang tang stuff???

12. to appreciate my friends more... my true friends... I know I've ruined some relationships due to my mood swings and all...

13. to blog about something more interesting maybe??? I know you find my blog damn dead bored.

14. to join gym.

15. to love you more =)

Okay 15 for now... I somehow achieved something last year, I quit smoking! How great is that? And each time I feel down down down... I so wanted to pick up that cigarette again but I didn't!! I deserve a round applause rite?

Also I've changed a lot in my eating habit... I'm not always on the Nasi Lemak or oily and non-healthy food... More health concious now... Like plenty of water and vege and fish.

And the most that I've achieved in material is my own room after 20++ years...

It was empty then with the super bargain chandelier from rm1.6k to rm300, thanks to bestie! And the super expensive wallpaper from Kevin.

The the tilam and the bed frame

Then the beautiful lamp that brings out the most cosy feel to the room!

I used to use this basket to put ALL my skin care back then, so I thought since the collection grew bigger, I put hair care instead. BUT............

I have some on the table now...

The hair care and body care in a DRAWER...

And skin care itself in another drawer... and not forgetting another 2 baskets...

I never regret having them, guess Kevin don't either cos he's the one who paid most of it... Cos these are what I've been hoping to have when I get my own room, spending some private time for myself to pamper myself a little bit and enjoy the room and privacy.

I wanna have more stuff like a laptop so I can watch DVD in there! Besides, I'm still looking for more vintage, country looking deco for the room...

That's all for now, it's Monday and I'm very very lazy to do anything... Need to start planning for CNY, should I take leave?

2009-12-31T17:27:00.002+08:00

Woot~~!! Bye bye 2009... Welcome my dearest 2010!!!

(polish shoe abit so I'll have a good year ahead ma... fml)

I'm feeling all excited to welcome the brand new year, I am so hoping it's gonna be a brand New and Happy Year...

I have so many wishes and resolutions...

Not gonna pen them down here but no worries... They are in my heart and I hope...

God Bless all of you... Wishing you a joyous and fruitful New Year ahead!

Not forgetting best of health!

xoxo,
Penny :x

2009-12-28T18:03:00.002+08:00

Words can't describe, face can't show either

I just hope everyone can just leave this question, and stop asking WHY? HOW? WHEN? THEN?

I really wish I have all the answers and have the heart and courage to repeat how it happened but unfortunately I don't.

I'm in fear now, thinking how my life would be without you, I'm trying to avoid thinking how it hurts me, I'm trying hard to still put a smile with teary eyes... I know my face are always cheating people, I'm always the I-am-okay face but today the face can't lie.

Anyway, though I'm not happy, let me wish all of you Happy New Year, will still hope that your business will grow, stable and happy @ work, and healthy life!

2010 is a brand new year...

2009-12-24T17:49:00.002+08:00

Merry Christmas 2009

Hello all... Busy packing ready to go home for a change and start your celebration??

Hope all of you enjoy your Chirstmas Eve... and Happy Holidays!

xoxo - penny

2009-12-21T11:10:00.003+08:00

Festive Season = ??

It's ridiculously pack at shopping malls, I just couldn't believe the traffic at Sunway Pyramid... It's really horrible... Well, everyone wants a taste of Christmas decorations? Hmmm...

This year... I started to feel exceptional to fuck-the-year-end, in fact I'm feeling pretty happy... =) How rare...

Eventhough I'm working on my diet but still, me and kev will look for good food in the weekend... He bought a food guide book in Klang Valley and I tell you, that's a POISON!!!!

Mill Wheel @ Kepong

Cookies n Chocolate

The texture of the shaved ice is really smooth and milky

Watermelon, lychee and honey dew ice on wok

Quite big portion but the Lou Fu Kao managed to finish it up by himself...

We went to Sunway Pyramid after our heavy lunch yesterday and the traffic was a mess!!!! It was so jam the whole area but Kev being Kev.. he found a nice parking spot within 5mins... Lucky boy he is... It was quite warm and stuffy... Maybe too pack

We walked around and after 30mins... dead... Too tired and hot, so we stopped by for my all time fav Iced Latte... I think that's the best time for iced drinks...Even the air cond wasn't helping much, we couldn't feel the cool air at all.... Slurp the drink like mad... Look at the cup... =) I loveeeeeeeeeeeee Xmas deco, in case you guys don't know, I really really love xmas deco... Gonna show you some of the stuff that I've bought...A waste of money but, they are all pretty!!!

Snowflakes!!!

I thought it was a sinful lunch we had on Sunday... So... to make myself less guilty, I've prepared a Lettuce and Tuna chunk for today's lunch...

Good Day everybody!!

2009-12-15T10:03:00.003+08:00

FML = Fuck My Life

I should change my blog title to Fuck My Life a Lot rather than love a lot.
I don't know when I will have a chance to live in a normal way. This is making me mad, really mad now.

I really wish there's someone who can lend a hand here but I know, nobody.

Life is so unpredictable for me, this second I thought everything is fine, the next second I'm off to the world of sadness, what is wrong here? I don't deserve to be happy???

I told someone, in one week, at least 6 days I'm being upset by someone. Why???? I just fucking don't get it, day by day I'm living here with no meaning, no motivation, no support, no morale support, no happiness no nothing good but SHIT!!!

What have I done in the past life to deserve a fucked up life now??? Seriously, why??

Now, I want to be alone, really all by myself... Cos, I really don't wanna spend time saying things I don't wanna say for the sake of entertaining people or listening to other people complaining, everyone wants to say something bad to upset me further, but... I already have TEN THOUSANDS problems running in my head... Why there's nothing good to tell me??? WHY??? I am really curious, when I reach home, I heard people complaining things to me, in the office, my boss says nothing good but blames and responsibilities or colleagues being a bitch, and with the rest of the people that I don't want mention, I've not been hearing good things also... everyone is showing black faces to me...

I'm seriously... tired... How many times do I need to repeat myself...

2009-12-09T15:23:00.005+08:00

Quietly passed

We are approaching 2010 and I'm looking forward to a brand new year... Better year, I'm really hoping for a better year, stable career and income.

The weekend passed very quickly, elder bro's wedding, mum's birthday, biz trip to singapore... Ahhh talking about this damn trip, i was suppose to travel on 3/12, on 2/12 @1130pm I realized my passport has expired few months ago! And FML, my boss was so upset and lost like a child couldn't get into that damn merry-go-round, she insisted that i have to be there.

So at 730am I went to renew my passport, that damn thing took me 3 hours plus to complete. And my boss insisted me to take Airasia flight at 1245pm to meet the meeting time @230pm in Singapore. So Kev rushed me there like mad... and checked in at 1145am. Flight delayed... FML, what's wrong with them? First time taking Airasia and it's definately not a good experience, walked damn far, and you actually board the flight thru STAIRS???? Okay, whatever, I arrived at the office on time. That's it!!

Then my birthday, went to a nice dinner with Kevin @ Chulo, Jaya One. All I can say is, the food is awesome, superb!! I definately wanna go again and again! Thanks honey for the dinner...

Besides that, no other celebration at all which I'm quite disappointed, thought I could enjoy a dinner or party with my friends but guess, I'm thinking too much... :/ Anyway, nothing is a good thing I guess.

Mixed Skewers, prawn, lamb and chicken

Cheese and potato gratin, *thumbs up*

Spanish dunno what rice with herbs, super good!!

Butterfish with lemon sauce, fantastic

Then we ordered a Margarita for each to end the night with a lil tipsy... =) I'm really really glad cos this is something new to us, we hardly dine together like this. Bad thing about this... I was sick the weekend with inflammed ulser in mouth... Couldn't really enjoy the food, maybe Kev wanna bring me there again... like SOON??? Very very soon? Hahaha so greedy...

2009-10-27T14:05:00.004+08:00

Taiwanese Fong Lye, Gardens, Mid Valley

This is our current favourite... Words no more... Here are the pictures...

Still da same?

Glorious pork!!!!!!!

Cooked into perfection

So much I'm loving it, one fine day at my working place.

I have this special lunch delivery

Ahhhh I could smell already...

3 sauce chicken!!!!! Lou fu kao's fav...

The rice and the minced meat is really good! And it comes with a double boiled soup too!

Who else but lou fu kao who does the special delivery =) Well well... Hopefully there'll be more updates in no time!

2009-10-19T10:45:00.002+08:00

A plan that is planning for a plan

As you can see from the title, I'm a bit confused right now. I hate year end, I always do.

Many people are asking what have turned me into who I am right now, why am I looking so depress and quiet? Part of me is worrying about the year end curse, relationship, health, financial, career and death.

How many people can deal with these with a calm mind? Probably you are getting ready to buzz me in msn to tell me it's ok, I'm here with you, it doesn't matter, cheer up mate, take care... But frankly speaking, how would these help to make me better?

I always have to remind myself I'm a human, I need to care for my own feelings as well but many times I forgot...

I've lost all my interest in blogging, I've lost interest in taking photos of myself or any interesting things to post here. Simply because, nothing excites me anymore.

Yes, I'm doing not bad at work.

But I'm dealing with one or two sickness that I'm not going to tell. It's hard, many of you can realize thru my eating habits.

I'm also dealing with many other issues.

Today, I'm dealing with a... something... someone... I cannot afford to write anything about it. It pains me out to write even anything about this... Anyway... Good Luck... Be Strong!

I am trying to hide this away... I'm trying very hard, don't ask me or don't mention anything, leave it this way... I'm trying to avoid, yes I'm...

2009-10-12T18:33:00.002+08:00

So, who cares??

I was talking with someone just now. It was a very serious issue that we were talking about.

I was thinking, I have so many people to care of their feelings, and most people will come to me to share their bad news.

Just how much of people never think of my feelings, I'm wondering if anyone will take time and sit down and think "how is Penny feeling? She've been listening to all my complains and shouting for so long..."

But the fact is a FACT... No... Nobody will ever bother how I feel.

Seriously... Especiall those that I'm seeing very often... I'm really upset with some people around me... It's a shame to even mention...

2009-09-29T10:33:00.002+08:00

It's been a month since I last updated

I haven't got time to tell you guys about my new job, new environment, new responsibility, everything so new....

And my new house (or room only?)

My job is pretty hectic, no guidance at all, it's like a new position for this company, just come in, sit down and start doing what I'm are paid for...

No questions should be asked cos people here are not willing to help, except for this girl named Lily... She's really nice but too bad she's new also, limited info she can share with me.

Anyway, it's good to learn about planning for promo and really hands on to all these marketing stuff....

I have some photos to share but I really don't have the time at all, either I'm at work, or shopping for furniture with Kev, or at home sleeping....

2009-09-01T21:16:00.003+08:00

Lonely.... I'm so lonely...

2009-08-31T23:12:00.002+08:00

How? What if?

I have so many How's and What if's running in my mind...

Anyways... All I need to do now is call it a day as suggested by my kor...

Hoping for a brand new start tomorrow...

2009-08-26T21:18:00.003+08:00

I am a housewife for one day

My mum was busy at friend's place so I had to cook dinner.

Only... ONE dish...

Potato sliced

Onions and garlics

First, I fried the sliced potatoes and set them aside, then down the garlics, and then onions. Add in the minced meat which I've marinated with some basic seasonings. Fried them till they are cooked.

Add in some water, just a bit and the fried potatoes, fry a little bit more and tadaaa yummy minced meat with potatoes.

2009-08-25T19:05:00.002+08:00

Very unsafe to have an account with Maybank

I know how convenient Maybank2u is but having so many suspicious and fraud emails from some people to ask for your password and etc is really frustrating.

The title says something like "Your account might be at risk" "(Recent Notification) Unauthorized Access Discovered" and the senders are Maybank2u Berhad.

They are a bit smart as they re-named the link as www.maybank2u.com but it links you to their website.

Whatever it is, I'm wondering if something can be done to make us feel more comfortable banking with u?

Or is it not only Maybank? Share with me if you have such experiences....

2009-08-24T13:43:00.003+08:00

Overly fattening

It's been a really sinful weeks since I last attended office...

Oh ya... Kevin couldn't resist Popeye's and here we are during one of these weeks...

Normal fast food settings

The fried chicken which taste so much better than KFC, at least they have fresher chicken

Super yummy chicken flavoured mashed potatoes, I really love this!

This is what I cooked when I'm alone at home
Tomato puree, minced meat, onions, and a bit of milk

Cream of chicken soup, herbs, pepper, and some water

2009-08-18T00:49:00.006+08:00

Northam Hotel @ Penang and Seafood at Bkt Tambun

Okay I loveeeeeeeeeeeee Northam Hotel, the suites are damn nice okay? This is the Junior Suite...

There's a mirror on the right and a washroom on the left of the entrance... How thoughtful?

Kevin busy replying messages to his customers....

My fav place of the suite is the bathroom and the jacuzzi woohoooo!!!

The view from the room

The comfy big bed

The camwhore girl, just woke up....

The see thru bathroom

This thing is a heaven!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so we extended one more night from our 3 days 2 nights, for??? Bkt Tambun... Cos Kevin really wanted me to try every single food that I love in Penang... Cos he couldn't make it the previous time...

The very jammed Penang bridge

So here we are at this seafood restaurant, the one and only floating restaurant at Bkt Tambun. This is the fried noodle... I forgot the name but it's something we won't order in KL... Not mee, not yee mee...

Fried Mantis Prawn with salted egg yolk, the mantis prawn was soooo big!!!!

See the meat? This is only 1/4 of the body!!

BBQ crab

Ever wonder what's that wooden thing for????? They use this to crack the shell!!!!! No metal hammer or the "kepit" metal thingy there!!!!!! I was so amazed with that wooden thingy!!! I've never seen it before...

The steamed crabs that have gone before I managed to grab my camera...

Headed back to hotel and enjoy our night with some snacks

Beer

The end...

2009-08-11T14:36:00.004+08:00

Penang with my dearest

Part 2

Ready to eat!!! Yummm

What are these people waiting for???? This place is located infront of Pulau Tikus's Police Station, just right opposite

Nah, ah pam balik!!! Those mini ones... You have to wait at least 30-45mins during off peak hours!!!! But it's worth the wait.... You have to try!

This is also at the same coffee shop opposite the Pulau Tikus Police Station. You'll see a long queue for Char Koay Teow and other fried noodles in the morning but I went around 4pm... So the queue wasn't that bad...

Char Koay Teow!!!! Yummmmmmmm I love this!

And the rojak which is also in the same coffee shop, good!

At night, we headed to Northam Food Court, we sat right at the corridor next to the SEA!!! The sea water kept splashing up to us and his friend, funny!!! I really like that!!! Hahaha the food was a bit too pricey but the bbq seafood was very good though!

His friend brought us around the town and we lazily headed back with some beers and Fried Chicken skin from Gurney foodcourt and wrapped up for the day!

So much of food, so much of beers, so much of hugs and kisses, I definately think this is a very very good vacation planned specially from my dearest to me... I told you... No one else will can replace you.... Thank you!

2009-08-11T01:47:00.006+08:00

Lou Fu Kao and his sweetie wife @ Penang 1 - 4 August 2009

Part 1

In the morning (not morning cos Kev slept till very very late). I was so hungry that I went all mad... Okay that's very normal when I'm hungry.

We dropped by near our hotel at Gurney, for a Brunch... Never thought a simply bump made us a good bump!!! The food was really good and the price I would say okay as well...

BKT~~~!!!

Fried mantis prawn with oats

Vege with chicken floss, I dunno why they top the vege with chicken floss, Penang style eh?

Hungry kid

Rice and tea all set

All cleared in less than 15 mins... (It took a lil longer for me of course)

Looking from inside... Ahhh beach!! Sua gu!!!

We paid and hopped over, just across a street and we are at this place!!!

When we were paktoh'ing at the sandy beach, Kev immediately had this idea and picked up a stone and....

Asked me to take a pic of his art, while there were passerby...

But we were very shamlessly happy

2009-08-07T19:33:00.003+08:00

Yet another bad news

I seriously got no idea how long are these bad news going to be over.

They've been haunting me for so many years by now. I'm feeling very exhausted already... Everything inside my heart slowly vanishes of, bit by bit...

Just like she said, thru the bad times, I'll be able to see who are the real friends and people that are really concerned about me. Yes, I'm able to see... And I'm thankful... I guess this is the thing that are keeping me going until this far.

Everything that can be done has been done...

Now... I'm only here waiting... Waiting for the sun to shine again... Though I don't see the end of this nightmare at all...

Waiting...

2009-08-06T13:38:00.003+08:00

Bestie post

Okay, I hardly have bestfriends in my life.... Some of you who followed thru my blog will definately be able to name out the girls who have been with me thru the goods and bads.

Lately, someone special came into my life. This is something to be happy about when things are getting worse in my life, at least I get something and someone good out of these crisis that I'm facing.

This particular girl, who came out of nowhere (seriously bestie, how did this happened??) She filled my life as a great companion. Knowing that I'm super duper free now. she is always around to ask me out for a drink. We love gossips, we love hot steamy topics (oopss), we have so many in commons to share and she's such a sweetheart that even my friends love hanging out with her!

Though many might not be able to help but Kor and Bestie have been around to keep me busy. I know how much time they've spent on me just to keep me out of my negative mind when I'm too free.

I cannot stress out how thankful I am with you people, my dearest Kev, the Bratz, Kor and Porkie... I love you all to the max!

My mum has finally said it right to my face about something, my jaw dropped flat on the floor last night. After that, I think about all the consequences and tried to forsee the future, now I'm feeling freaking scared and worried. I dunno if these are the symptoms but, I'm seriously very pressure... VERY VERY PRESSURE, honey.... do you see this??? I said I'm very pressure...

Okay, photos time...

From left: Eileen, Malatlou (no he did not tap on my shoulder, he just wanna act macho, Bestie, Me)

Me and my lovely bestie

The girls

Bestie and Me

Pan Pan: Eventually it gets thisssssssssssss longgggg....

Me: Warao heh heh heh

2009-08-05T12:22:00.003+08:00

I'm back from my favourite place, Penang Island

This time I have so much sweet memories brought back, unlike the previous visit.

I'm so tired right now, physically restless...

Okay... We started our journey on 1st Aug 2009.

And we supposed to come back on 3rd Aug 2009, but I didn't eat enough, so we extended one more night... Which means I just came back yesterday. Long holiday huh?

I'll update more once I got my M2 memory slot, anyone has it??? I don't...

After a long bath when we arrived, I saw my zebra is holding a note... The note is something unforgettable

Pale face, checked!

Fried lala at Gurney Drive, checked!

Stay tuned for more... Until I get my cable or memory card slot la

2009-07-28T11:51:00.003+08:00

Week 2 measuring land

It's getting tough, I'm getting some pressures already.

I'm lazy today, I'll leave the pictures do the talking this post.

Got lose weight mou?

Liddat? On da way to shopping =P

I'm not being paranoid but yeah, I did use tissues to absorb oil of my fried dim sum...

Say bye bye to this messy desk, say bye bye to this nosiy person!

Say bye bye to this waiting point before lunch! Hehehe wait for toilet crews to clean the toilet before lunch.

When I first joined, there were 7 of us to go lunch everyday, then we left 6, then 4, and now... 3... Sigh... How am I gonna find back such a great team to hang around during working hours? I think.... never...

2009-07-27T01:26:00.003+08:00

Brightness in the dark?

I have to admit that I'm still feeling down, but... Don't be sad first.... Cos I wouldn't smile and still be able to meet Mr Sunshine.

I have people who give really really good advices in terms of personal and career. He's the only person that I can trust because he is always ever ready to give me all the clear directions and advices...

Then my ex-colleagues (the MLL) and my bestie. Thanks for spending time layan'ing and also taking time out for a dinner and drink with me. Though I may not show how much I'm appreciating it, but deep down inside, these are the things that keeps me going thru.

Last but not least, my dearest. I don't know if I really deserve him or what. He's showering me with so much love and laughter... To make a jobless person feels that there are no worries at all. I've been working like mad dog, so it's hard for my family to accept the fact I'm sitting here doing nothing! He made it clear to my parents and they are very well understand about the situation, I don't think I can make them understand, but he did.
On top of that, I also got a surprised today... A brand new Charles n Keith heels =) I really did laugh out from the bottom of my heart the past 1 week.
Thanks for planning and helping me throughout this.

Tell me if he's not a sweetheart... I love you!

Having said all these, I'm having a clearer mind now and hopefully days will be better soon.

2009-07-22T00:12:00.003+08:00

Day 2 measuring land

In case you don't know what "measuring land" means, it is when you are jobless and you stay at home do nothing. That's "measuring land"....

So far I'm doing quite good, spend my time browsing some stuff I've left out during the past few months. Chatting with some friends, going for tea, and etc.

Kev spent a night OT-less to come accompany me cos he's quite worry I'm not adapting to this kind of lifestyle. He arrived at 8pm and quickly dragged me out for dessert and Carrefour to stock up more food.

Though we didn't manage to go anywhere further, spending an hour watching TV is more than enough to know his intention and concern.

I really miss my ex-colleagues so much, they are feeling exactly the way I am... I confirmed a dinner with them tomorrow cos we are missing each other a lot.... You guys are really stars in my life!!!! Never know I could find friendship out of a yucky company!

Anyway, I wish I could stay beside Kev all the time, he's the only person to calm me down and make me feel that it's something to be happy about to "measure land".... How silly my dear...

Super sad that I've left out my Kor~~!!! He had to rush to "cam" with before he could showe just to show me Porkie. But Porkie couldn't take her pretty eyes off the window =.=" She is a super adorable bear bear looking Schnauzer... With messy misai...

Talking about my kor, he has been a great person to give me the advice that I could only trust... He is not like any other person telling me "don't worry tomorrow will be a better day" kind of person...

As always, together with all of you right beside me... I'm sure I'm heading towards the bright side of my life, right???

Life has been terribly bad these few years, but it's not worst cos thought I'm failing at my career but in return I get love and care...

Afterall, life isn't perfect, not gonna be....

2009-07-20T00:59:00.002+08:00

I wanna be a full time blogger

Wondering when will I be the next Xiaxue... Earning a 10k cheque out of blogging...

What's the time now? 1am? But I'm still here online, while waiting for my DS to be fully charged. Not sure if this is what we called faith or what. Kevin recently bought me a DS Lite but I hardly have time to play as I've been working from 7am-9pm daily. I can only play 30mins before I fall asleep, or while waiting for bus at work.

Kevin has been the best bf ever, I was having a huge problem explaining to my family, he managed to communicated these as a good news to them and I was so surprised that my parents think the same, that this job isn't suitable for me at all, it's dangerous, parking damn far, odd working hours, odd public holidays and the nature of the job is so not for me.... I told my bestfriends, I never like this job but I cannot afford to give up, that's all. Now that I've walked out of it, feeling fucking dissapointed with some people, and at the same time I miss some of them dearly.

Kev has been comforting me with so much patience and ensuring me this is not something ot be sad of... Just like how my bff told me awhile ago. I am so thankful over you guys...

Dear, thanks for everything you've done and will be doing to make me feel so much better.... Muacks!

2009-07-15T09:20:00.002+08:00

A lil update of what the hell I'm going thru now

I've been so tied up with so many issues now, not only myself, but other people around me as well.

I've been alone most of the time, attending to many recovery processes of most of my problem.
I'm tired living this way.

I'm feeling so thankful the moment I told a few people that I'm not working in after 2months, I'm freaking surprised that many people is in support!!!! My darling offered FOC living if I'm not working, I don't need to worry about my expenses, well... I never thought I'd work for money, but in this case, I think I am? No? Cos I don't like what I'm doing at all... This job does not require my skill at all, and eventually my PR skill has been sinking like nobody's business.

I've come to this end and I'm telling myself, life would not be perfect, I've achieved so many things in the past few years and this is my first time hitting the wrong thing and ended up SO WRONG! I'm only upset that I'm not that capable to everything yet! I've been changing so many industries, whether hell or heaven, I left with good comments, I'm staying not because of money or anything but... the colleagues and the truth that I've not been accepting that I really cannot do administration job! I have no sense of details, I'm definately not the person.

But like my bestie told, I should try my best, at least. Which I'm doing. At least I try right? Put aside the result... Lol...

I am feeling super blessed cos so many people out there waiting for me to give up and ready to bring me up again, why?????? I'm not worthy la! But I seriously feel thankful!

I wanna take a break after working since I was 19... I want a break... few weeks? Few months? Hmmm or permenantly BREAK? Hahaha... I think Kev is shaking already hearing this.

After talking to someone a couple of days ago, I've changed SO MUCH, I'm a totally different person now. I asked "good or bad?", this person said "Damn 9 bad la Penny".... Shit... But I think I'm not in position to give up, my day will come and yes, I'm at a positive side now with nothing to worry anymore...

Thanks to "you" (if u r reading) for offering me back... I will consider, really... But not anytime soon k? I know year end will be busy but I need a lil rest after being mentally tortured for so long. I want to enjoy my work again! Just like how I used to be, k?

Wish me luck people!

XOXO

2009-06-21T17:33:00.003+08:00

Body Shop on Sale

Okay, maybe its too late to blog about but, I wanna share with you all that my skin can only tolerate natural ingredients' product.

Origins, Body Shop, Ettusais, and Kose

Body shop is my all time favourite for body care... I love the refreshin fruity scent!

Besides pink grapefruit, I also love Satsuma...

Body Polish, Lotion and Lip Balm

(the body polish is really good, it has foam unlike normal scrub)

Shea Body Butter for super dry skin. It's a bit sticky but that's a butter, so it's acceptable for

Lip balm craze...... I love their lip balm very much. They gives appropriate moisture to my super sensitive lips!

I cannot stand ANY (YES, ANY) of the counter brand's lip balm, Lip Ice (whole Mentholathum range), HABA, Biotherm, Clinique, Lancome, Avene, and etc... Khiel's also cannot... Basically NOTHING!

Body Shop's lip balm, if you have chapped or cracked lips, once you apply, the dead skin will then detached from your lips and you can remove it easily, then you get the soft lips again =)

2009-06-20T14:49:00.004+08:00

My Basic Daily Care... Kose

Last weekend, I bought a herbal mask, exfloating massage cream, and eye cream from KOSE.

Today, I'm going to review my daily washing.

From left; Powder wash, Lotion (toner) and Emulsion (moisturizer)

Wash with Powder Wash

Brighter skin after washing

Tap on lotion (toner)

Final step, Moist it with Emulsion

I really love the immediate effect, and this range is very very good at giving water to your skin, good hydrating agent for your dry skin!

Next, I'll do a review on the scrub and mask =)

2009-06-08T20:18:00.008+08:00

Penang 2 days 1 night

Well, honestly I didn't eat much there, it was a relaxing trip.

Kevin has been really tired recently, as he's working 8pm to 6am daily.

We arrived with my all time favourite dim sum, opposite KDU college at Anson Road. I dunno whether you agree or not, usually dim sum cost us around at least rm30-rm50 for two person (if you eat like me) but, this place, regardless how many you eat, I never encounter more than rm30 for two person... This place is huge, and it's quite hard to find place, and it's self service...

This is the first batch of food that Kevin took, the rest were forgotten for my blog, sorry! ^^

The hotel walkway

Hotel corridor

Room's view...

Ready to go

Gurney!!!

Asam Laksa and the sotong... I love the sotong

Fried chicken skin and other stuff, I miss this already

Fried Oyster that Kevin queued for soooo long

This shop is in Queensbay mall, Taiwan Bull

I love Taiwan food lah Beef Noodles

Herbal Beef Noodle, the soup is really geng!

Deep fried prawn cake

Icy fruit jelly, oooo yummy

Just wake up

"Baby, come go home la~~"

It was so jam all the way from Penang, so we decided to drop by Ipoh for Taugeh Chicken at 10pm. We supposed to wait for some car club people, but they were so slow that they stucked in the jam for so long and we couldn't wait, so we tried to be adventurous, and find out ourselves.

Pork ball soup, my favourite

Taugeh

Lou Wong Chicken, owh so nice

As you can see, not much of a Penang to talk about, but yeah, that's all we could enjoy... Tomorrow need to go work la, Sien lah!

2009-06-01T21:16:00.003+08:00

As promised, skin care

3 weeks ago, I was crazily trying on new foundations and tinted moisturizer, from various BB cream, to Lancome, to Biotherm, and many more... I ended up having a super horrible face, I was sooooo depress that I wanted to suicide (ok that's a lie)...

I didn't even dare to snap a pic. I have a very sensitive skin, very very sensitive, I don't exactly know what ingredients because most of the products are not suitable for me...

Coincidently, my Ettusais Essence has finished...

I gave up totally... Until Kevin decided to get me Kose... I didn't have any faith in the products, it's quite pricey and not so famous to me... I'm afraid I'll have allergy with it... But he got them for me anyway...

This lotion gave me a miracle result. From an irritated reddish face full of rashes... The immediate effect was to give a mild cool down to my skin. And on the second day, my skin was softer (not smooth yet) and then slowly in a week, the rashes were gone =) OMG I was sooooooo happy... 2 weeks of itchy and full of rashes face, KOSE's lotion managed to remove them away for me, not forgetting follow by my ETTUSAIS's essence.

Another thing was, I never use make up remover to remove my sunblock, cos I thought it was colourless and not a foundation... However, I've got a cleansing oil from Kose which was really good to, it removes everything includes my mascara and eyeliner =)

I love the Kose Lotion the most, what about you??? Now this is my secret...

No, I wasn't posing giler on purpose yeah! Just to show you the after Kose skin

2009-06-01T08:22:00.003+08:00

You make me hate you, I'm sorry

Seriously...

I take this off not because you still worth a friendship, but I just don't want to bad mouth you any further...

2009-05-28T16:20:00.002+08:00

I feel completely blank now

Right now, I'm completely out of my mind

I totally don't know what I want to do the next second

I feel as if my brain is too weak to even think in a functional way

I'm dead, physically and mentally, I'm completely OUT

Stay away from me, give me some room to breath

I hope time will tell and explain everything, I'm not able to cos it's not the time yet

2009-05-25T20:45:00.004+08:00

Doughnut Marathon

It was really amazing how the first Big Apple and J Co launched. I dunno why it was a big hoo haa out of a sudden.

Everyone queued for hours to get some of these huge varities of doughnut. I used to love Dunkin Doughnut but now, with softer texture of the new generation of doughnut, I finally think Dunkin Doughnut sucks... The batter so thick and tough! Like chewing on a overnight dough!

So, everyone is talking about Krispy Kreme, how can I miss it? One lovely morning, Kevin drove me all the way to town just to taste a bite of it...

The standard box

Hershey's Cookies and Cream, Hershey's dark chocolate, Chocolate Cake, and the Original Glaze

Unfortunately, I still prefer the local ones, the dough is a bit hard and thick, the toppings are a little too stingy, just a small drop of chocolate on top is not enough for me!!! There I get another surprise, a door step delivery from my personal delivery boy... Mr Kev!

Anyone knows that I love miniature stuff??? I loveeeee the minis!!!!

I love Jco

I was left at home alone on one Friday evening, I came home angrily and when I opened my house door and ehh... Hahaha... How am I supposed to get angry? My heavenly sofa... Too bad it's not pink la....

2009-05-21T19:55:00.003+08:00

ISETAN SALE

Oh my... See what have the Sale do to me...

I am a big big big fan of Ettusais, they said I can be the ambassador already...

They have this limited edition of foundation...

The texture is surprisingly smooth

This is the Stila Palette that Kev said nice

Shades ok?

Total victories of the day!

I have the bestest Ettusais Eye Makeup Remover, the shiny round thingy is the medicated powder from Ettusais, 3 pastel Stila eyeshadows, my San Sin essence from Ettusais and the Pinky foundation...

These are the colorful stuff that I've got...

Next coming up I wanna talk about skin care...

2009-05-18T09:52:00.002+08:00

Skin Care Craze

As if it's not enough, I've been visiting Mid Valley (The Gardens, Isetan) since Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday... I couldn't get enough of Isetan.

Everyone knows I'm a big fan of Ettusais, their stuff are seriously good, not oily and very good at doing a hydrating job to your dry skin.

They are having a Isetan Member's sale, where Kev got to grab a set of the sunblock + medicated loose powder for me with a great savings from the actual price =)

From the Stila counter, I've got myself 3 pastel sweet eyeshadows.

My skin is having allergy to some cosmetics I've tried for the past week, and it's flaky and dry now, so damn ugly!!!!!!! I got out of my mind and I'm super freaking out already. Kev got really interested with Kose stuff as they are made of oriental herbs... Thinking it'll be good enough for my skin. So he bought a Sekkesei Lotion and Cleansing oil... They works really good on my skin, the cleansing oil is so wonderful... The best part is the Lotion, it's soooo nice, the after-texture is something you didn't expect...

I'm gonna keep track on the progress and do some review...

Thanks to my dear...

2009-05-16T13:32:00.003+08:00

Black Black Manicure of the Week

Dark chocolate brown, looks yummy?

Da couple...

It's Saturday lu... Time to meet up again... Ahhh after 5 days... Weee... Hope you guys have a great weekend too...

2009-05-13T21:28:00.002+08:00

Tadaaaa ugly hair

Let you all decide whether it's ugly or what la...

See pictures!

My long fringe

Can you see this guy is wearing long sleeve??? Nah he ain't a normal hairdresser!

After chopping my fringe at the restaurant next door (Jaya One)

The next day at work, Kev just want a double confirm, so he asked for an mms and I gave him this!

3 Days later...

2009-05-13T14:05:00.001+08:00

Why am I always like that???

Kevin wanted to get me the DKNY be delicious, limited edition in PINK!!! But I said no, the scent it's not nice, I don't like it...

Now, I'm missing it... But's it's not selling anymore I think...

Can someone please kill me???

Thanks...

2009-05-13T11:13:00.002+08:00

I've got tagged by a cat!!!!!!!!

Once you've been tagged, you have to write a post with sixteen random things, habits or goals about you. At last, choose five people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them.

1. I wonder why is it 16... Hmmm

2. I hate my new haircut cos it doesn't excites Kev

3. I just couldn't get the right tinted moisturizer after 100 years searching, wth %^#

4. I've quit smoking for many many months d

5. My manicurist, Ms Jess still owe me a sample of a tinted base and a pink souvenir from Bangkok!

6. I love pink... Cos I have a pink phone, comb, wallet, cosmetic pouch, gloss, balm, hairband, mp3, pen, candy and p****liners in my bag daily, how pink is that?

7. I am in love with a Pink Gucci Leather Speedy, oopsss... *ahem*

8. Ms A made me walk in the rain yesterday because of her slow-ness in packing, and we ended up chatting at Starbucks from 530pm-9pm!!!

9. Every Wed and Fri, Ms A and me will make up to work

10. I've got a darkkkkkkkkk brown manicure this week! (I never like brown!!)

11. Wanna have some good friends!!! I wish to have someone who appreciates me (my goal =s)

12. I have a very bad habit; emo out of nowhere! *laughs*

13. I'm having 1000 emails in my office's inbox, with 200 over emails unread! (god, save me lahhh aiyo)

14. I need money to stock up my cosmetics and skin care

15. I am afraid of getting old

16. I'm done with this 16 random thingy!!!

Okay, I'm not tagging anyone...

2009-05-08T07:55:00.001+08:00

I had a super haircut yesterday

Oh my...

Pictures tonight...

Those who've seen me, please comment!!!

My bf hates it... *sigh*

2009-05-07T08:28:00.003+08:00

Super failure...

I was feeling very upset yesterday, nothing could explain the words deep inside. I'm feeling so miserable and there's nobody I can turn to... I feel like I've lost all my capabilities these recent years.

I've mentioned somewhere in my blog last year, that I've climbed too much too fast, I've missed the track of being a young lady, I missed the track of doing simple jobs at work with less responsibilities, I missed the track of being drowned by love from a bf... I came from nothing from my past, with horrors and nightmares. I was treated like a working machine that generates money every end of the month.

So long that I couldn't recall what I've missed in my life. Ever since I left my previous telco company, everything changed... From A-Z... I'm a total different person now... God gave me an easier job now (though something sucks too), new loving bf, and also introduced me to friendly colleagues... These three things have never happened... I never laugh so often in the office, I never know how to act like a typically kitty cat to my bf (I used to be the tough one) and I never know how it feels to be relax at work. Cos all I was dealing with; was Millions of ringgits a day. Anything goes wrong, there goes the wrong!

Now it seems like I'm tuning back to a 20 years old lifestyle, I am not so workaholic anymore... And I wish to start to learn how to enjoy my life...

Yesterday I went to One U with one of my colleague, I managed to test Lancome's sunblock, and I had terrible allergy reaction to it... Oh my... Failed... While nobody wanted to layan me at Biotherm, but it seems like I hate the super strong fragrance that comes in the sunblock... Maybe should try Dr. G...

2009-05-06T09:58:00.003+08:00

I am finally recovering

Woot... Talking about my hair, it's like so long and messy now, as PK said, it's not grass, it's lalang!!! Wtf...

I've been wanting to trim it or at least, do some style??? Nah... Not gonna do a bob cut or chop them off... I need it to be long for some occasion in the future *shy*

I'm so hunger of recommedation for tinted mositurizer + spf + everything... Now I have some in my list to consider; Lancome's Neuroshield SPF 30 PA++ Make Up Base, Sasa's DR. G BB Cream, Biotherm's Corrective Make Up Base with SPF 25 PA ++...

Anna dear strongly recommend me Dr. G Hydra Intensive BB Cream from Sasa... She said she don't even need to apply powder after that, it's smooth and not sticky at all... That sounds great isn't it? BB cream always does wonders. It comes with SPF 30 PA++ The original price is RM97 and now it's on promotion, RM77....

Lancome's Neuroshield is at RM150 and I think, THINK cos I've not heard any comments or critics, solely base on my thinking, it's very good, it has hydrating function and it says dermalogically tested for sensitive skin =) But it's a bit too pricey for me... But I think Lancome's stuff wouldn't be bad right? Any comments? Share with me...

While the Biotherm, my bff Yvonne said it's quite good cos it comes in purple, pink, ivory, and white, these colours are more suitable to cover your skin problem, reddish, pale, yellowish and etc... Rather than skin tone! It is RM135...

I have no idea, I'm really desperate for one that is good with a lil bit coverage...

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I was talking to a friend about status in someone's heart. Do you have multi levels of friends? Or they are all friends? How do you group them as your bestfriends? Based on their outlook? Or their commitment in the friendship? Or duration that both you've known?

I go for commitment in the friendship, honestly, and duration. I am not a friendly person, obviously. I am not a social butterfly... I am very particular in this, I give privillege to my old friends (bff) and less to normal but good friends. I think it's quite sad when you think you deserve a better position in someone's heart but in fact, they treat you same level as their newly met friends? Get what I mean? Hmmm I think it depends on individual...

Thanks for fighting the rights for us, though you failed and we'll never meet again, but it's great to know you...

To all the believers, go on and hold on to your faith.

To all the followers, go on and get yourself a real you.

To all the pretenders, go on and realize what your heart needs.

**Love a Lot**

Love a Lot